


To rain a flood

by mkhhhx



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dating, Domestic Fluff, Doting on Lee Donghyuck, Established johnkun, Flirting, Friends With Benefits To Lovers, M/M, Miscommunication, Non-Sexual Intimacy, OT4, Open Relationships, Polyamory, Semi-Public Sex, Side Taeten, Smoking, Smut, Softer than you'd expect, Sugar daddying (with feelings), Switching, a bit of Emotional Constipation, dowooil said be gay do crimes, side dowoo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:08:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28093683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mkhhhx/pseuds/mkhhhx
Summary: Maybe a while ago a suggestion like that would set him off: sharing, being shared. But right then it feels more right than wrong, it feels like Donghyuck’s lips on his own with Kun’s and Johnny’s eyes on them could set him alight.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck I Haechan/Qian Kun, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Moon Taeil, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny/Qian Kun, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Moon Taeil/Qian Kun, Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Suh Youngho | Johnny/Qian Kun
Comments: 44
Kudos: 301





	To rain a flood

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
> Since I've never attempted such a long one-shot before (and hopefully it's the first of more to come!) I'm very excited and equally stressed to share this with the world. 
> 
> I'd like to thank [Chrys](https://twitter.com/chrys_mark) and [Mash](https://twitter.com/sungchanery) for betaing this, it was a lot of work and without their help it wouldn't be as smoothed out as it is. An equal huge thank you to everyone that has hyped this fic up and beared me talking non-stop about it the past two or so months. 💗
> 
> [Here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6trtG9dFZphaQ2UnbPZAVh) you can find the playlist for the fic. It helped me a lot while writing/editing and working on it was another really nice part of the whole process. 
> 
> A quick note: The characters ages aren't explicitly mentioned in the fic but Donghyuck is in his mid-twenties and Johnkunil are in the early to mid-thirties range. 
> 
> Alright, see you at the end!

Taeil truthfully didn’t know what he was getting himself into. He was never the one to sleep around too much, but a good time was welcome every now and then. A good time with Kun turned into two, and then, eventually to even more. 

That’s how he finds himself in his multiple-nights-stand’s house looking for the bathroom to take a piss at seven thirty in the morning. It was too late to leave when they were done but Kun’s husband was already home so Taeil had taken one of the guest rooms, Johnny’s loud snoring echoing from a couple doors away as if he was acoustically marking his territory.

When he’s done with the call of nature he decides he’s too hungry to go back to bed and walks to the kitchen, barefoot on polished wood. He’s not sure he’s surprised there’s someone else already there.

“Morning,” he says, trying to act casual. “I’m Taeil.” He doubts there’s use in adding his surname too. 

The boy perched on the counter and leisurely spreading jam on a piece of toast gives him a smile before swallowing his bite down. “Hi Taeil. I’m Donghyuck.”

Taeil locates the coffee machine, a professional looking one with way too many unnecessary buttons, features and even some levers, but through a bit trial and error he makes it work, waiting while it does its wonders. The sugar canister is right by the coffee maker and he’s thankful he won’t have to rummage the cabinets, or even worse, take his coffee black. 

“What brings you here, Taeil?” Donghyuck asks and Taeil takes the first proper, good look at him. He seems a few years younger, clad in an oversized shirt that looks like it’s Johnny’s.

“I’m—“ Taeil’s eyebrows furrow; he’s not sure of how to answer the question. “I came back home with Kun last night.” He doesn't know who Donghyuck is, or what he’s doing in the Suh-Qian household so early in the morning, but he believes he’s free of judgment.

“Kun has an eye for the pretty ones,” Donghyuck smiles opening the fridge with his foot and passing him the milk for his coffee, as if he already knows how Taeil likes it. “I’m Johnny’s sugar baby.”

“Sugar baby,” Taeil repeats. He’s still too sleepy for his mind to register things, but he gives a little nod nonetheless.

“You know, I’m pretty and cute and Johnny pays for my college tuition and buys me nice stuff.” Donghyuck gets started on his second slice of bread, picking up a different jar of jam this time, leaving the first one still open on the counter; as if he knows someone is gonna clean up after him and he can get away with it.

“Cool,” Taeil sips his coffee looking at the vast garden in front of the house. He’s been at Kun’s place before although he hadn’t stayed the night and they were alone. “Have you been…affiliated with Johnny for a long time?”

Donghyuck giggles, but it’s a kind sound. “For a little more than a year now,” he scratches his chin, the tiniest hint of stubble there. “Both Johnny and Kun are great to me.”

“Cool,” he repeats. “I think I should get going soon.”

“Do you have to go to work?” Donghyuck asks, legs swinging and Taeil shakes his head. “Then stay for brunch.”

“Brunch?” Taeil’s stomach growls and despite his instincts telling him he’s overstayed his visit, he’s more than tempted. He doesn’t work until much later anyway.

“Kun and Johnny always wake up late on their days off but Kun’s pancakes are worth the wait.” Donghyuck shrugs, leaving the final decision up to him and Taeil, still a little sleepy and uncoordinated, lulled by the promise of pancakes, takes a seat on the kitchen table. 

All through his life he’s seen and done a respectable amount of wild and weird things. Getting brunch with his fuckbuddy, his fuckbuddy’s husband and his fuckbuddy’s husband’s sugar baby is certainly very high on his list.

***

“How did you and Kun meet?” Donghyuck asks the second time their paths cross at the Suh-Qian household. Donghyuck is loitering in the living room and Taeil meets him when he gets downstairs to fetch water and maybe some snacks after getting down and dirty in the master bedroom’s wonderfully plush bed. He realises Donghyuck must have heard them but pushes the thought down before embarrassment starts creeping in. Kun told him he was free to stay for as long as he wanted and Taeil, wisely, had decided to take up the offer at least until he was a bit steadier on his feet.

The original plan was to go upstairs again and maybe sit with Kun in the study for a while. Instead he ends up on the couch, on the opposite end of a sprawled Donghyuck. “I met him at the bar I play music at.”

“You play music?” Donghyuck eyes him, face lighting up with excitement. “What kind of music?”

“Mostly rock,” Taeil shrugs. “Sometimes pop songs too depending on the crowd and my mood. It’s a friend’s bar so the side money is pretty nice.” He’s been playing at Doyoung’s bar a couple times every week for years, for so long that the wooden bartop feels like his second home. He loves the live audience even if it’s limited, too. Nothing fancy, but he can do what he loves nonetheless. “By day I’m a teacher at a music school.”

“So you have a pretty good voice,” Donghyuck states.

“Seems like it,” Taeil chuckles. He’s been making money out of his voice for more than a decade now, so he’s grown pretty confident in it.

“And I suppose you play the guitar?” Donghyuck eyes him up and down, like the guitar playing ability is very important in assessing Taeil.

“The guitar and the piano,” Taeil wants to show off, just a bit, just to see Donghyuck’s eyes go wide for a moment.

“That’s so hot,” Donghyuck muses. “Good job, Kun hyung.”

Taeil didn’t think that the first time he met and slept with Kun would mean anything more than just that: a good time. Kun had approached him after Taeil had finished his setlist for the evening, had thanked his audience and received a nice small round of applause. He was getting ready to bag his guitar and mic, considering having Jungwoo fix him a drink before heading home.

“You’re really good,” Kun had told him, approaching the set. It was way after midnight and Taeil was tired, so he had muttered a generic “thank you so much,” with a smile. “Are you leaving?”

That’s when Taeil had actually lifted his eyes to first look at him. His face looked familiar. A really handsome man, probably in his early thirties, curly dirty blond hair framing his face and a simple but expensive looking white button up on.

“I might stay for a drink,” he had answered, catching Jungwoo and Doyoung looking at him from behind the bar.

“I’m Kun,” the man smiled. “My husband, Johnny, is here with me tonight,” he looked back to the table, his gaze meeting Johnny’s who lifted his glass in a sort of greeting. “He has somewhere to be later, so he’s not coming home with me tonight. Would you be interested to?”

Taeil needed a moment too long to understand. Kun, a married man, was asking Taeil to sleep with him with his husband a few meters away. It wasn’t that shocking because Taeil has been around enough to see all kinds of relationships, but he had never been in that exact position before. Kun’s husband, Johnny, seemed completely lax on his table, nursing wine and scrolling through his phone.

“I’ll have a drink,” Taeil had decided. He hadn’t been laid in too long that despite the tiredness he didn’t want to turn his chance down. Kun didn’t look half bad either. He actually looked too good. “Then we can go.”

Kun took him home in his car; a simple Yaris and Taeil barely had time to register the garden they passed by, or the spacious living room area, or the photos hanging by the staircase before they were falling on the bed and shedding each other’s clothes off.

Taeil couldn’t decide if it had just been too long, or if Kun was actually _that_ good. He was slow and attentive. He had everything they needed in a drawer of the bedside table, neatly organized. He took Taeil into his mouth and opened him up slowly with his fingers, littering the inside of his thighs with kisses when he had started squirming impatiently.

And when Taeil was leaking so much precum he couldn’t take it anymore, Kun manhandled him on all fours and pushed his back down, placed heavy hands on his sides to keep him grounded as he fucked into him, fucked him so good Taeil passed out a couple minutes after his orgasm.

The next morning he was wonderfully sore, stretching out on the wide expanse of Kun’s (and Johnny’s) bed. He took up the offer of a shower, but not for breakfast, thanking Kun for the nice night before he called a taxi to take him home.

He didn’t think he’ll see Kun again, but life is full of surprises. Only two days later when he was lazily channel surfing looking for something interesting, there he was. Kun, the same guy that dicked him down, clad in a pink apron, whisking eggs. So that’s where Taeil knew him from. He has his own cooking show every afternoon. It took a little more to realize he had seen Johnny before too, John, the evening news anchor at Channel 9.

And after a week Kun appeared at the bar again, this time alone. Ordered the most expensive whiskey Doyoung could pour him and watched Taeil’s whole performance attentively. It was only natural that they’d fall in bed together that night too, except that they also had breakfast the next morning, Taeil mentioning he saw him on the television and Kun laughing about it. They exchanged numbers too, so their next few meetings were arranged, some nights at Taeil’s place, other times at Kun’s when Johnny was away.

Despite having more than a good time Taeil thought the whole thing would just die down eventually, assuming Johnny and Kun sleep around with people like this every now and then. He wasn’t bothered by the thought of being expendable; he got his fair share out of it.

That plan, of him being expendable, dies out on that very morning he meets Donghyuck and joins him along with Kun and Johnny around the breakfast table. Nobody’s in a rush and nobody seems like they want him to leave. There’s chatter and laughter and more coffee. The vague feeling that they want to keep him around nests in his chest right then and there, small and almost insignificant. It does never really leave afterwards.

***

Their arrangement does the exact opposite of dying down over time. In the next few months after his and Kun’s initial meeting Taeil gets to know him. There are all those things that everyone could figure by spending a mere couple hours with Kun; his most obvious love for cooking, humming to himself when he moves in the comfort of his own kitchen and hovering anxiously over anyone else touching his equipment. He is friendly, overly so, but he knows how to assert himself and regain control of the situation when he needs or wants to in his subtle ways, maybe a skill developed by working in the entertainment industry. He likes all kinds of little luxuries and joys; expensive drinks, tailored clothes and he practices the art of flirting like it’s second nature.

There are also all the other things. The ones Taeil can see at early mornings when they wake up together and at late nights when they are about to fall asleep, spent. Kun’s little mannerisms and facial expressions, when he’s excited and it shows only in his eyes, when he is considering something and his brows furrow, mouth a thin tight line. 

There is an array of things Kun loves under the surface level of knowing him. He plays the piano and has an interest in music and the more technical aspects of it, has even mentioned he had thought of pursuing it academically, even though his true love lies elsewhere. 

Much to Taeil’s surprise he wasn’t always interested in hosting shows, even more cooking ones. He has a physics degree and is finishing up his master’s thesis in aircraft aerodynamics. He tries explaining the topic to Taeil, who can’t do much but nod, not even having the base knowledge to understand much. The more time Taeil spends at Kun’s place the more Kun gets locked up in his study. Sometimes Taeil joins him, basking in the quietness of the room and the ways Kun’s face shifts when he’s concentrated on something. At some point sleeping together isn’t what takes most of their shared time anymore, but rather a common indulgence they both give in to. Maybe they’re becoming something akin to friends. Maybe something more, or something completely different. Taeil never liked labels and he doesn’t feel any pressure to apply any on something that’s obviously working well, label or not.

Johnny comes as a package deal with Kun and at first Taeil finds him somewhat intimidating. He’s huge after all, towering over both Taeil and his husband with ease even when he is constantly slouching. His presence cannot be ignored, voice and laughter loud and clear when he’s in the house, echoing from room to room.

It turns out the real Johnny Suh is a stark contrast from the serious, brooding news anchor Taeil sees through his tv screen every now and then. He is friendly in the way big dogs often are; so lovable and loving to an almost overwhelming point. He has his own set of quirks and endearing habits too, Taeil not on the receiving end of them, not yet, but allowed to watch from the sidelines. Johnny always kisses Kun before leaving and after he comes back. He tries cooking only because he knows Kun will come to his rescue if he whines long enough. He enjoys spoiling people, be it with love and affection or material gifts.

“He’s very giving,” Kun says one day they are at the study making small talk, Kun taking a brief break from his work. “Sometimes he’s just too kind for his own good.”

And Taeil knows that Johnny is nothing sort of a pushover, but he does tolerate a lot for the sake of making the people around him happy. He likes playing around, loves cracking bad jokes just for everyone to laugh for not laughing. He spoils both Kun and Donghyuck in any way and form that he can and soon enough, in small ways, Taeil becomes a receptor of that spoiling too — a little gift, a cup of coffee, time spent together even though Johnny could be elsewhere instead of entertaining Taeil.

It’s easy to see why he and Kun chose each other for life. There is so much love and they bring balance to each other. Two proper adults in a proper relationship, open and flexible, but the two of them always at the center, orbiting around each other. Taeil has never considered marriage for himself, has never found a person that would make him feel like taking that big of a next step; but seeing Kun with Johnny makes him believe that truly happy endings do exist.

Then, there’s Donghyuck. It takes a while to figure that one out. He’s loud and takes up so much space but can grow timid and shy in the blink of an eye, especially when there is a Johnny involved. He spends a lot of time at Kun’s and Johnny’s place because “it’s lonely at the dorms”. Johnny very obviously absolutely adores him, indulging him in everything he might want and need. Kun is more reserved but he cooks Donghyuck’s favorite foods, lets Donghyuck smother him with kisses and leaves the softest quilt on the couch for when Donghyuck falls asleep there after doing homework at the living room when Johnny is out. At the end of the day nobody can say no to Donghyuck and Taeil, soon enough finds out he’s not any kind of exception. 

Donghyuck has Taeil wrapped around his finger in no time at all. He calls him his “cool hyung” and asks for rides on the motorcycle. On the days Taeil spends the night with Kun and Donghyuck is there when he wakes up he drives him to his classes. He meets some of Donghyuck’s friends too and gets a couple free overpriced coffees out of it although he insists Donghyuck doesn’t have to make up to him for spending a bit of extra gas.

So Taeil gets caught up in the little world of the Suh-Qian household. Early mornings in the still cold kitchen sipping coffee with Donghyuck. Evenings spent sprawled on the couches, talking, cuddling, watching movies or whatever is on tv. Late nights behind closed doors, pressed on the sheets. Johnny slaps his back when he gets excited and Kun learns his favorite dishes by heart. Donghyuck starts pressing kisses on his cheeks and once he starts Taeil can’t get him to stop (and he doesn’t want to).

The whole arrangement shakes Taeil out of his routine for a while. Then, as things keep progressing smoothly and naturally it ends up being his new daily normality.

***

“Love,” Johnny appears in the living room, slacks and blazer on, clutching his laptop case in one hand and a leather briefcase in the other. “I’m going.”

“Okay,” Kun stretches lazily, arms thrown above his head until Johnny leans in above the couch for a kiss that leaves Kun smiling softly. “Be careful while driving, did you get your umbrella?”

“Yes, yes,” Johnny stands at the back of the couch for a moment, like he’s not sure he should get going yet. “Did you sleep well, Taeil?”

Taeil looks up from his phone where he was occupying himself to give the couple some privacy. He had taken the guest room the previous night since Kun and Johnny always sleep together when Johnny isn’t out until too late or isn’t spending the evening with Donghyuck. “I did,” he smiles. “Even your guest mattress is too good.”

Johnny gives a breathy laugh at that, hovering above Taeil’s space. “Do you want one too?”

“One what?” Taeil cranes his neck to look at Johnny as Kun giggles next to him.

Johnny taps his own lips making a smooching sound. “It’s unfair that I don’t get the most kisses available.”

Taeil laughs at that because he hasn’t considered Johnny before, not like this. But he’s in his thirties and by now he knows a kiss doesn’t have more significance than the participants want to give to it. So he puckers his lips,flutters his eyelashes and waits for it.

It’s a small peck and nothing more, Johnny leaving one on his lips and another on his nose before he straightens up unceremoniously and he’s out of the door holding his car keys. The smell of Johnny’s aftershave clings on him afterwards when Kun noses on his throat leaving open mouthed kisses there.

“So how did you two meet?” He asks, leaning in Kun’s space. A basic question to which somehow he doesn’t have the answer yet. It’s one of the rare days neither of them has to move for the foreseeable future and it’s raining outside, so there is a silent agreement of slumping on the couch with tea and homemade cookies.

“We met at a club I used to co-manage,” Kun says, hands wrapped around his warm cup.

“Really?” Taeil tries to imagine them, younger them. “I always assumed you met through the entertainment industry.”

“Weirdly so, we didn’t,” Kun laughs. “Although that’s what most people think and it suits us just fine.”

“It sounds like a fun story,” Taeil has time. And he’s interested in the couple too just for the sake of knowing them better and understanding their dynamics.

“Johnny had already started his career as a journalist and back then he was working for an online magazine.” Kun leans back on Taeil’s chest, an open invitation to have his hair stroked, so that is what Taeil does.

“He actually came to the club for an article he was working on, it was pretty funny. He was very respectful so the owner and my friend Ten, who still runs the club, took a liking on him.”

“And what about you? How does the love story start?” Taeil starts massaging Kun’s shoulders although he’s already pretty relaxed. It feels good to knead soft muscle nonetheless.

“I was working as a bartender while finishing my studies back then. Fixed Johnny some drinks and explained a few things about how the club runs. I think he was initially interested in Ten, but Ten was taken and going through some kind of honeymoon phase. No complaints about it,” Kun chuckles. “That worked pretty well for me.”

“I’m glad it did,” Taeil says. “You are good together.”

“We were just sleeping around for a while until John decided to take his head out of his ass and properly asked me out.” Kun continues, a note of fondness laced in his voice. “The rest is history.”

“What about the cooking show? You’ve been doing this for quite some time, right?”

“For about three years or so,” Kun says. “It started as being featured on another person’s show and honestly I don’t know how I ended up having mine. Guess the viewers liked me.”

“You’re pretty likeable,” Taeil says, although he isn’t referring to the cooking show.

“You think so?” Kun grins, turning around to look at him.

“Wouldn’t be here if I didn’t,” Taeil answers, truthfully.

“Yeah,” Kun mutters, turning serious and looking down at his hands. “We are open to communication, right? Both me and Johnny and even Donghyuck too. We haven’t tried this before.”

“Opening up your relationship?” Taeil leaves his mug back on the low table to properly hold Kun. It’s been a couple months already and it’s only natural they have to talk about things. Taeil was never good with words so he appreciates Kun making the start.

“We’ve both been sleeping with other people throughout our relationship and it has always worked well,” Kun explains. “Donghyuck was the first more permanent fixture in our lives. He’s stuck on calling Johnny his sugar daddy still, but he’ll grow out of it. It’s obvious there’s more than that from both sides, although it’s not my place to interfere. Donghyuck is very dear to me too.”

“Am I the second?” It almost feels like he’s overstepping when the phrase leaves his lips, but Kun’s expression remains the same; soft, a little worried.

“We’d want you to be. If you’re up for trying that long term. It’s something we can work on as time goes; we don’t have to decide on every part of the relationship from the start.”

“So, like a fixed partner then?” Taeil has thought about it, somewhat settling, having something he could call a relationship with Kun. Or with more people, judging from the way things are going.

“A partner, yes,” Kun nods. “My partner, and whoever else’s you’d want to. For a fact, I do know that Johnny is interested.”

“He’s really subtle about it—was, until this morning at least.” Friendly, but had never tried to make any advances past that kiss. Then again, he already has his hands full with a husband and a Donghyuck.”

“He has his own way of doing things, but he wanted to be sure before he started with the flirting. Believe me, if he was flirting you would have known,” Kun chuckles and Taeil has seen enough to be able to imagine how sappy Johnny can be. “You can talk with him about it, right?”

“Right,” Taeil agrees. “I’m in for this, this whole thing with you, I’m in.”

“Good,” Kun turns around sitting fully on his lap. “Bring some clothes to leave at your room next time you’re here,” Kun says, not giving any chance to Taeil to answer, all his thoughts dying down with Kun’s tongue licking into his mouth.

***

“What would you consider an ideal first date?” Johnny asks. They are at Taeil’s apartment, two buckets of fried chicken between them and Kun at the other couch about to go into a food coma.

“I don’t know,” Taeil shrugs. “I think it depends on the person, I’m not that picky.”

“Yeah,” Johnny hums. “That’s not the answer I want, tell me about something that would _really_ excite you.”

“Am I coming too, can I have a word?” Kun mumbles, hugging one of the pillows. Taeil thinks of the mechanics of all of them fitting on his double bed. Not that easy but possibly feasible with some determination and a lot of cuddling.

“No, you’re not, that’s mine and Taeil’s first date,” Johnny pouts. “Nobody else is invited.”

“Fine,” Kun turns his back to them, burying himself deeper into the couch.

“What is _your_ ideal first date?” Taeil lifts an eyebrow. He might as well play Johnny’s game.

“Long drive to the seaside,” Johnny smiles. “Parking and fogging up the windows, drinking expensive wine from plastic cups afterwards.”

“The windows don’t fog at summer but it’s still pretty good,” Kun chuckles. “Have tried it.”

“But the sea is too far from here,” Johnny’s lips cast downwards, as if the universe will spare him, bend to his wishes, and bring the sea closer.

“We can go to the aquarium,” Taeil says then. A little ocean in the middle of the city. “I’ve never been to the aquarium and I’ve always wanted to.”

“You’ve never been to the aquarium?” Johnny gasps. “Never ever?”

“Only once with my parents but I was too young to remember,” there are some photos of the trip, but for one reason or the other Taeil never had the chance to visit an aquarium after that. He realises the thought had barely passed his mind until Johnny presented the words first date and sea side by side.

“That’s…” Johnny clutches his chest dramatically, “that’s so sad Taeil…nobody has held your hand looking at your pretty face when you were busy staring at the fish.”

“Please feel free to be the first to do so, then,” Taeil messes Johnny’s hair and Johnny kind of rubs on his shoulder, like a too oversized cat.

“The offer for car sex afterwards stands,” Johnny laughs, Kun groaning on the side.

“Sleeping together on the first date?” Taeil lifts Johnny’s chin to press a kiss on his lips. “Tch tch tch, you have to be patient and romance me Johnny Suh.”

“I’ll romance you, then,” Johnny kisses him back, tasting like spicy chicken and the cheap beer Taeil keeps in the apartment and maybe a little bit like Kun too.

They are different in the way they kiss. Kun is eager, kisses like he’s taking what is his, never shy or holding back and his tongue into Taeil’s mouth is as familiar as Kun’s palms pressing his waist down on the mattress. Johnny is more gentle, reserved and slow. He likes to savour the moment and he likes pecks instead of open mouthed kisses too. His hands wander on Taeil’s shoulders and back when they kiss, but they don’t pull him closer or demand his full attention. Johnny is just enjoying the moment, maybe mapping Taeil out for a later time, as it’s sure to come in handy.

They do end up going to the aquarium for their first date and as Taeil should have been expecting, Johnny goes all out, showing up in front of Taeil’s apartment with his car freshly washed and shining along with a bouquet of flowers waiting for him at the passenger’s seat.

“Hey pretty boy,” Johnny leans across the console for a kiss. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Taeil finds himself smiling too wide, trying to put his seatbelt on while balancing the bouquet on his lap. It’s all a little ridiculous, even more after agreeing to not dress up and be casual, both in jeans, Taeil wearing a hoodie and Johnny a button down and a grey cardigan.

They fight for the tickets (Taeil pays) and soon enough they are inside the aquarium, bathing in blue, fluorescent light and the shadows of the creatures swimming by.

“Do you mind,” Johnny asks, lifting his camera to his eyes, lens focused on Taeil.

“I don’t,” Taeil smiles, looking up and reading the information hanging in the form of signs with huge fonts by the exhibits. He’s slow to move around, trying to read everything, take pictures with his phone and let his eyes rest watching the inhabitants of the tanks. 

Johnny takes photos of him. Him with the manta rays and the sharks and the sea turtles. He takes photos of the shadows on the walls and the penguins and the eels. And they take selfies too, pressed side by side, wide smiles on their faces and Taeil really wonders how long it’s been since he last did something like this, allowed himself to be silly and enjoy a date as he did when he was much younger.

He realises he missed it, focused only on sex or staying home and resting, but this too provides another different kind of rest. The peaceful smile that comes after his lips are stretched till they hurt from too much laughing, the way the tension leaves his body when Johnny pulls him flush on his chest for a back hug in front of the sea horses. It soothes Taeil’s soul and suddenly he thinks he wants to take Kun out too. Donghyuck even, if they are up for something like it.

“You’re really pretty, do you know?” Johnny says, hands intertwined between them as they watch a bunch of snails moving leisurely between seaweed.

Taeil finds himself blushing, unable to look at Johnny. He mutters a small “thank you,” between his teeth, feeling his ears flare up. He’s amused to find Johnny has that effect on him, apparently.

And when he actually turns to take a good look at Johnny’s profile he finds him already watching him. Tilts his head, a little confused, a little playful, feeling so alive.

“I know it’s only the first date,” Johnny laughs. “But I really want to kiss you afterwards. Kiss you a lot.”

“I’ll let you,” Taeil nods. He’ll let Johnny do way more than just kiss him. “Since you’ve been so nice today, I will.”

Not quite unexpectedly they end up on the backseat of Johnny’s car, seemingly alone at a corner of the almost empty aquarium parking lot. Taeil is pressed on black leather between the shark plushie Johnny got him and the octopus he got Johnny. His hands are on Johnny’s back, gently scratching down as they kiss, Johnny on his lap arching onto him, hips moving slowly against Taeil’s body.

“Can I?” Johnny asks, _chants_ against Taeil’s lips, his hand, his incredibly big hand sliding down Taeil’s chest and coming to a rest on his stomach. “I want to touch you.”

“Do you?” Taeil cups Johnny’s cheek. He enjoys kissing him. Enjoys how Johnny becomes putty in his arms.

“Please, hyung,” Johnny asks and Taeil smirks, basking in the power he seems to have over him.

“Did you plan this?” Taeil asks, rubbing slow circles on Johnny’s cock above his jeans before he unzips them, not even bothering to unbuckle Johnny’s belt. The smell of flowers left on the passenger’s seat is almost overwhelming paired with the clean, strong scent of Johnny’s cologne and suddenly Taeil wants to see him wrecked.

They end up in a mess, bouncing and sloppily moving against each other, cocks in Johnny’s palm and mouths connected as they come one after the other in the small space in between, their ruined clothes the last of their concerns as they try to catch their breaths.

“You’re really pretty too,” Taeil smiles up at Johnny. Johnny who’s still half dozing off, his cardigan sliding down his shoulders. Johnny who leans down to mouth on Taeil’s neck and whisper little praises on the soft skin, still riding the high of his orgasm. Taeil has a hard time believing he can have that too, Johnny Suh on his lap, telling him how they’re gonna fuck properly next chance they get.

“Let me take you back to my place tonight,” Johnny says a little later, when he is half composed again and sliding into the driver’s seat with Taeil next to him.

They find Kun reading in the living room, glasses low on his nose as he greets them with a little nod, giving them an once over and probably liking what he sees because he grins.

“Hyuckie, look who’s back,” he says, a disheveled Donghyuck appearing from the kitchen holding a bowl of cereal.

“Hey hyungs,” he winks. “You look like you had a good time.”

“Oh we did,” Johnny kisses Donghyuck’s forehead before he pecks his husband. “How about we all make use of the master bedroom today?”

Donghyuck jumps up and down in excitement to this. “Cuddle pile!” He exclaims.

“Sure,” Kun agrees, eyeing Johnny. “It has started getting cold, hasn’t it?”

“We could sure use some extra body heat.” Johnny agrees. “To reduce the electricity bill.”

“I’ll be glad to help,” Taeil laughs. “To reduce your electricity bill. Hope I get some pancakes out of it.”

“Oh hyung,” Donghyuck smiles. “You’re gonna be getting way more than some pancakes out of this.”

Later, after he has had a shower and has changed into clean clothes Taeil finds himself between Kun and Donghyuck, Johnny’s leg thrown over all three of them. It’s not the most comfortable position, but Kun’s arm on his waist and Donghyuck’s breaths on his nape are comforting in a new kind of way. So much Taeil is almost scared he’ll never be able to have such a good night’s sleep again.

***

His first kiss with Donghyuck doesn’t come as a surprise, but it catches Taeil unprepared anyway.

He knows how physical Donghyuck can get, how he craves touch like his life depends on it. When found in the Suh-Qian household he’s either draped all over Johnny, or kissing Kun’s cheeks and lips, snuggling by his side. Him being affectionate towards Taeil like this is a new development, but a natural one and neither Kun or Johnny bat an eye.

“Hyuckie is just like that,” Kun laughs the first time Donghyuck climbs on Taeil’s lap and settles there like it’s his hard-earned throne. “He feeds off other people’s bodily warmth.” Taeil doesn’t know how it happens but soon enough Donghyuck’s weight on him is as familiar as Kun’s or Johnny’s, if not even more. 

Friday evenings become their thing, a thing for all four of them. Kun comes home relatively early from the day’s recordings and Johnny is back from the evening news a little after half past eight. They all settle on the couches and pick movies to watch. Johnny makes popcorn and brings drinks and they do their comfortable little thing.

It was a romantic comedy that time. A little funny, a little dumb and Taeil was rooting for the main couple fiercely; they deserved their sappy happily ever after like everyone does. With the movie long over and the television off, they still don’t move.

Kun is half dosing off on Johnny, sprawled on his chest as Johnny plays with his hair and Donghyuck is by Taeil’s side, comfortable and warm under the blanket they’re sharing.

“Hyungie,” Donghyuck smiles, nuzzling on his neck. “You’re so warm I could sleep right here.”

“You can sleep,” Taeil caresses round cheeks, tries not to think how close they are, how Donghyuck’s whole body is pressing on his and how pretty he looks. “I’ll take you upstairs afterwards.”

“Hyung,” Donghyuck repeats. “Wanna kiss you.”

“Kiss me?” Taeil’s first instinct is to look at Johnny. He’s watching them, still occupied with his sleepy husband on his lap. He gives a little nod with a gentle smile.

“Can I?”

Taeil feels fuzzy at the edges. Maybe a while ago a suggestion like that would set him off: sharing, being shared. But right then it feels more right than wrong, it feels like Donghyuck’s lips on his own could set him alight.

“Okay,” he swallows down, an arm hooking around Donghyuck’s waist. “Okay, alright.”

Donghyuck makes the tiniest happy noise in the back of his throat like a cat getting his treat. He moves slowly, leisurely, Taeil feeling like he’s being set on fire as Donghyuck straddles his lap and looks into his eyes, half-playfully, half-adoringly.

Taeil, for that brief moment, sees what Johnny has the privilege to be seeing for so long. Taeil would burn cities down for Donghyuck to keep looking at him like this, like there’s nobody else in the world, like he’s safe and sated and wanting every little thing he can get out of Taeil at once.

And then they’re kissing and Taeil finds himself falling back because Donghyuck is so eager. Eager to lick into Taeil’s mouth, eager to moan quietly between their kisses, eager to press his palms on Taeil’s clavicles. Eager to take more, as much as Taeil will give him.

When Taeil opens his eyes again the realization is terrifying. Because he would give everything to Donghyuck without questions. He finds himself chasing chapped lips for one more kiss and Donghyuck indulges him. Gives him more than he bargained for. They kiss and kiss and kiss until there’s nothing but their hushed breaths and Kun and Johnny’s quiet chatter in the background.

“Can’t believe I didn’t try that sooner,” Donghyuck pulls away, fingers on Taeil’s chin. “Gosh, you’re a good kisser, did Johnny hyung teach you?”

Taeil spares a look at the couple across them, Kun’s eyelids heavy, but his lips stretched to a grin. Johnny looks amused but mainly just, just too soft.

“He didn’t,” Taeil’s voice comes out weak and hoarse and Donghyuck laughs.

“Might just steal you for myself then,” Donghyuck presses a kiss on his jawline. “I wonder what other things you are good at.”

There’s embarrassment, naturally. Embarrassment because there are people watching them. But there’s something else too. A little voice that tells him it would be so good to push Donghyuck right then and there, take him in front of other people. Of the specific other people in the room. Maybe that’s just Donghyuck’s voice because Taeil is sure he’d like that.

“We have a lot of time,” Taeil clears his throat. “Lots of time for that.”

“Of course we do,” Donghyuck pecks his lips again. “As if we’d ever let you go now.”

They kiss and kiss and kiss. Donghyuck loves kissing just for the sake of it and Taeil learns to enjoy it too. Against the fridge on early mornings, both sore from the previous night, coming downstairs from different bedrooms. In front of Taeil’s motorcycle when he drives Donghyuck to his lectures before it’s time to go to his own classes, or when he’s picking Donghyuck up afterwards.

Sometimes it’s soft. Sometimes it’s brief and sometimes they end up making out for what feels like hours. Sometimes Donghyuck kisses Taeil when he’s sitting on Johnny’s lap. Sometimes Taeil makes out with him when Kun is watching, half-hard in his slacks. It works in ways Taeil could have never thought before. It works and Taeil couldn’t ask for anything else.

“You know,” Kun peppers his neck with kisses, deep into him and moving slowly. “Johnny really likes to watch.”

“Does he, now?” Taeil manages, a low whine escaping his throat the moment Kun shifts above him. He’s been on the verge for so long and Kun moves so torturously slow.

“Would you like that?” Kun’s teeth graze the skin on his collarbones and Taeil shivers. Remembers the time Johnny and Donghyuck were in the next room when he was sleeping in the guest bedroom. Remembers Johnny’s voice, low and steady, calm. Remembers how Donghyuck was begging for his release.

“I think I’d like that,” Taeil says, nails scratching Kun’s sides, not enough to hurt him, but just enough for Johnny to spot the marks when Kun walks around the house shirtless after they’re done. “I think I’d really like that.”

***

“So,” Doyoung leans over the bar. “Surprisingly you came alone today, no lover boy in the crowd.”

“Are we sure?” Taeil jokes, turning around on his stool to look at the patrons. “Yeah, seems like it.”

“Were you planning on telling me you’re dating Kun Qian who makes cakes on national tv or was I supposed to find out myself?” Doyoung pushes a drink to him, his second for the night. It’s a really slow Tuesday and customers are sparse, leaving Doyoung with little to occupy himself, apart from pestering Taeil, that is.

“We weren’t very subtle,” Taeil shrugs. “He comes here a lot.” Maybe once every week or so Kun shows up, sometimes with Taeil, sometimes later coming straight from work.

“You sure weren’t,” Doyoung snickers, neat nails tapping the wooden bar top. “Jungwoo saw you kissing in his car when they were taking the trash out last week.”

As if on cue Jungwoo appears from the kitchen, dressed in a button up and vest combination similar to Doyoung’s with a long skirt underneath. They approach the duo with a wide smile plastered on their face and sleeves rolled up, an indication that they were most likely cooking something up in the kitchen.

“Isn’t that guy married?” Jungwoo leans down next to Doyoung, casting a look that could be judgmental if Taeil didn’t know them well enough to figure it’s curiosity.

It’s not like Taeil can deny it; Kun’s marriage status and his partner are publicly known. “I’m dating his husband too,” is what he says instead.

“Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn,” Jungwoo exclaims, Doyoung’s expression only slightly less passive than it was before. “And that’s working well for you? You three?”

“There’s a fourth person,” Taeil feels brave. Doyoung has known him since they were teens and Jungwoo is fairly open, so he doubts they would take the news badly.

“The one that comes here with you and pretends he knows how to pick good wine while he looks like any other vodka-chugging college kid?” Doyoung lifts an eyebrow, now playing with a cloth between his hands. He gets restless when there’s no work.

“That one, yeah,” Taeil nods. “He likes watching me play.”

“You’re really sexy with the guitar,” Jungwoo says, earning a Look from Doyoung. “What, he is!”

“You shouldn’t have cut the mullet,” Doyoung laughs. “You looked like a proper rock star.”

“I’m simply setting a good example for the teenagers I teach,” Taeil shrugs dramatically. He had cut his longer hair to a neater hairstyle before his first interview for the music school and actually liked how the short black felt and looked, so he hasn’t changed his hairstyle much since then.

“Yeah,” Doyoung cocks an eyebrow. “As if those kids don’t vandalize walls on weekends.”

“Oh damn,” Jungwoo takes a sip from Taeil’s drink. “I miss vandalizing walls too.”

Taeil doesn’t remember the first time he met Doyoung. He supposes it was on the first day of high school. What he does remember is their very first shared experimental kisses on Doyoung’s childhood bed. He remembers biking all around town and spraying on old buildings, the adrenaline when someone would notice them mid-job and call the police. They’ve been caught only once and it was quite unpleasant, with Taeil’s father being a cop and all. It was a fun topic to talk about after years, though.

They met Jungwoo much later at one of Doyoung’s college parties. Taeil never attended university but he was invited to pretty much all of the events, Doyoung’s friends taking a liking to him and his guitar and the infinite cigarette stash he didn’t mind sharing. Taeil had found Jungwoo sitting alone outside, the music raging in somebody’s house behind the closed back door and had offered them a smoke; the start of their long-lasting friendship.

Doyoung never made any use of his degree but he did make use of Taeil’s and Jungwoo’s friendship, seeing as he opened the bar a few years after graduating, already blissfully dating Jungwoo for a while by then.

“And can you make it work with so many people?” Doyoung asks. “Isn’t there any jealousy? It sounds like it can be messy.” He doesn’t sound judgmental and Taeil takes a moment to think of the answer.

“There is a bit of jealousy,” he decides, being honest. It’s difficult to equally divide attention to everyone, naturally. Sometimes Donghyuck will whine when Taeil has spent too much time with Kun and other times Kun will look at Johnny weirdly when he’s going out with Donghyuck for a second night in a row. “But it can work.”

They learn to talk about things instead of letting them pile up. They plan ahead the time they are gonna spend with each other based on their schedules and they all stay faithful to their Friday movie nights. Like every other relationship it can’t be seamless, not when there are four different people with their own personal issues involved, but Taeil, even without prior experience in a relationship like it, knows it’s pretty good, maybe as good as it goes.

“That’s great then,” Doyoung smiles, placing a hand on Taeil’s shoulder. “I like seeing you happy like this, you deserve it.”

It was Doyoung who held him after every break up after all, rubbing comforting circles on his back. Only Doyoung has seen all of the ups and downs of every single one of Taeil’s relationships from the very first one. If he says Taeil looks happy, it must be true.

“Thank you,” Taeil chuckles, downing his second drink, asking for a third one. He can take a taxi back home later and fetch his bike the next day.

He thinks of his previous relationship. One that started eight years ago on that same bar counter. Ended four years ago with broken glass and porcelain on his apartment’s floor. Jaehyun never came around at the bar afterwards so maybe he knows Taeil is still pissed at him for breaking his favorite mug. 

Mostly on instinct Taeil is convinced his current relationship will end up in much better ways.

***

He punches the code in and opens up to a dimly lit living room. There’s a videogame paused on the tv screen and Johnny watches him as he steps inside, takes his shoes off by the door and leaves the groceries he’s carrying on the kitchen counter.

“What’s up?” He approaches Johnny and his lapful of Donghyuck.

“He’s sulky,” Johnny bounces Donghyuck on his lap but Donghyuck doesn’t move, wrapped around Johnny tightly.

“Why?” Taeil walks around the couch to face Donghyuck. “Who hurt my baby boy?”

Donghyuck groans, burying his face deeper into the crook of Johnny’s neck.

“Yeah, he’s been like this for a while,” Johnny smiles. “Can you take him off of me for a while so I can get started on dinner? Kun’s not home yet.”

“Sure,” Taeil takes a seat on the couch next to Johnny who picks Donghyuck up like a ragdoll and leaves him on Taeil’s lap. “Hey baby,” Taeil greets and Donghyuck wraps around him like a koala. He’s way bigger than Taeil, but makes himself look small, tiny, as Taeil starts petting his hair.

Johnny takes the groceries out of the bags and looks around for the extra ingredients he’ll need. Kun was supposed to be making dinner, as he usually does, but he messaged their group chat while Taeil was still at the store saying he’s caught up at work and doesn’t know when he’d be back so Johnny took over cooking duty.

Taeil cancels out the patter and clinking from the kitchen to focus on Donghyuck. His breath is loud and Taeil is scared he’s gonna break out in sobs so he starts rubbing his back in slow circles, hoping that Donghyuck will calm down eventually. Taeil isn’t worried out of his mind only because Johnny is composed, his eyes filled with a bit of stress but otherwise handing Donghyuck over with no problem. Taeil knows Johnny wouldn’t even think about dinner if there was a real issue at hand.

“I failed an exam,” Donghyuck finally breathes out against Taeil’s neck. “I studied so hard and still—“

“Oh,” Taeil adjusts himself so he can press a kiss on the crown of Donghyuck’s hair. “It’s not the end of the world Hyuckie.”

“It’s my last year,” Donghyuck says and it sounds wet. “I don’t want to fuck this up.”

“You won’t,” Taeil reassures him. “You work hard and you’ve aced all of your other exams, didn’t you?”

“He did,” Johnny smiles from the kitchen and Donghyuck gives a little nod to it.

“But it’s okay to be sad about this one too,” Taeil feels how Donghyuck shuffles around to look at him. “We’ll hold you until you feel better.”

He thinks Donghyuck is about to kiss him, but he only leans in slowly, resting his forehead against Taeil’s, whispering a little “thank you hyung” and staying like this until Johnny asks them to set the table.

It’s not rare for Donghyuck to be moody, but it’s usually fixed easily with a cookie or a hug or a couple kisses. Sadly, in the grand scheme of things he’s not that simple and neither that naïve or young. Taeil remembers Donghyuck telling him how he felt like he lost so much time having to stay back at home to take care of his younger siblings while all of his friends were leaving for university.

“There’s no time running out,” Taeil had told him back then. “There isn’t any clock ticking down, you have to do things at your pace.”

Donghyuck had nodded, but he didn’t agree. If he agreed he wouldn’t beat himself down time after time or freak out after receiving a bad score. He wants to prove something, not so much to other people maybe, because he already exceeds other people’s expectations. Still, even after stretching himself thin as far as it goes he still doesn’t exceed his own, his impossibly high expectations for himself.

Kun comes home late that night, a plate with dinner kept in the microwave for him. He’s cranky and whiny after hours of recording at the studio. Explains that something was wrong with the electricity and it took hours for it to be resolved, having to record the show from the start afterwards. He isn’t talkative like he usually is and it brings Donghyuck’s mood down too until it becomes borderline awkward. So Donghyuck calls it a night and Kun shuts himself in his study, Taeil and Johnny remaining in the kitchen.

“I’ll fix you a chamomile,” Johnny says. He looks older like this, when he’s tired and serious, his face rough with stubble. “If you want to stay with me for a while.”

They don’t talk but it’s a comfortable silence, Johnny going over a stack of papers with his reading glasses low on his nose, Taeil just enjoying the moment, a rare quiet moment in the house.

“It’s okay if today wasn’t okay,” Johnny says, marking something with a green pen. “It can get too much for everyone sometimes.”

“What about you?” Taeil has seen Johnny being angry or moody. It lasts for a hot second and then it’s gone. No treats or kisses, Johnny composes himself on his own before he interacts with anyone when he feels himself slipping. “You are tired, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Johnny admits. “Life’s like that, isn’t it?”

Taeil thinks about it. He has been living a fairly simple life and he was lucky enough to land on jobs that didn’t try to tear him down. He never experienced the stress of university either, has only lived a tiny part of it second hand along with Doyoung.

“I don’t know if it has to be,” Taeil doesn’t have answers. He only knows there are ways for life to get better as long as there is will and maybe a bit of good luck on the side. “Maybe it shouldn’t be like this.”

Johnny ruffles his hair, eyes soft and affectionate. “Donghyuck has probably taken over your bed,” he says. “It’s late, you should join him.”

Sleep doesn’t come easily that night so he’s still up later, Donghyuck’s warm body pressed to his as he goes through this and that in his mind. He listens to Johnny’s heavy steps, climbing up the stairs. A knock and then the door of Kun’s study opening. It’s all muffled, but in the quietness of the night Taeil can hear just enough. How Johnny and Kun fight that night. How there’s only one pair of footsteps stomping to the master bedroom when they are done. He pulls Donghyuck closer to him and wills himself to fall asleep.

***

“I know this fucker is hiding a ring somewhere in the house.”

“Well if you know just wait until he’s ready to pop the question, he might be preparing something.”

“I don’t want to wait,” Ten whines. “I need him to get on one knee as soon as possible so we can have our dreamy spring wedding, or early summer, max.” Taeil has known him for about two hours and is absolutely enamored.

He wasn’t sure what to expect when Kun asked if he wanted to go shopping with him and his friend Ten, but he surely wasn’t expecting Ten going into an hour-long monologue about the hows and whys he knows his boyfriend Taeyong has sneaked a ring somewhere into their house.

“Why not midsummer?” Kun laughs sipping from his coffee. They’ve been walking leisurely around the mall for quite some time after meeting Ten by the entrance.

“My wedding is gonna have an open pool bar and I don’t want us to get sunburnt, duh?” Ten furrows his brows and Taeil can guess they’ve talked about the wedding plans before.

“So you can organize a huge outdoor orgy with all your friends at some private property as the ultimate wedding gift?” Kun’s expression stays neutral and calm, Taeil almost choking on his biodegradable straw.

“Obviously,” Ten says. “There isn’t much else we haven’t done till now and it’ll be good fun.”

“Suit yourself,” Kun laughs. “I’m sure John is going to be ecstatic with the idea.”

“Knew I could trust good ol’ JohnJohn,” Ten smiles. “He should join us next time, I miss his face.”

Taeil follows them around, enjoying the light bickering and passing Ten’s mild interrogation (“Kun’s my best friend, I need to know about his boyfriend, only the best for Kun!”) and looking at pieces of clothing that catch his eye every now and then. It’s been too long since he bought something new and maybe it’s an indulgence he can allow himself now that he’s actively going on dates and getting his hoodies stolen (Donghyuck the usual culprit, but Kun has done it too).

“Hey honey,” Ten turns to him in the middle of a store that’s too expensive for Taeil’s usual price range. He has his fun looking through the collection pieces though. “Do you wear suits?”

Taeil examines what Ten is holding, a simple black button up. “Not really,” he answers. He only wears a suit at the end of the year performance of the music school and it’s always the same; black blazer and slacks, white shirt, no tie. He hadn’t had to attend any other semi-formal or formal events in years, so he never bothered.

Kun draws closer, taking the shirt into his hands, feeling the expensive material. “Ten thinks you’d look good in this,” he hands it to Taeil. “I think you’d look great when I’ll be taking you out of it.”

“That’s right,” Ten chimes. “Let’s find you some pants!”

Taeil leaves the shop with a whole new suit, a shared gift from both Ten and Kun and also a couple blooming hickeys on his neck from the tiny make-out session he might or might not have had in the changing room when Kun asked to see how he looks with the suit on. All in all, a very promising purchase.

“Ten really liked you,” Kun says when they are heading back, having bid Ten goodbye, Taeil receiving a tight hug and a promise to hang out again soon. “He can be a little difficult but he’s my very favorite person in the world.”

“I liked him too,” Taeil peeks in the shopping bag at his feet. Wonders when he’ll get the first chance to wear the suit. It’ll be really fun if it’s at Ten’s wedding, where Taeil was very explicitly invited.

“I haven’t seen him in a while, he’s busy with work,” Kun turns the radio off and smirks. “He’s gonna get even busier with the wedding preparations now.”

“You know something he doesn’t, right?” Taeil laughs, Kun’s smirk breaking out to a wide grin. “You know where the ring is?”

“I do,” Kun nods with his eyes on the road. “But that’s between me and Taeyongie now.”

Taeil laughs, getting comfortable in his seat, Kun’s house quite a ride from the mall.

“We can all dress up and go for dinner,” he suggests. “All four.”

“We can do it instead of our movie night,” Kun agrees. “I haven’t been out in formal wear for something not work related in too long.”

“Do Johnny and Hyuck like suits too, or is it just you?” Taeil sees Johnny in semi-formal a lot before and after work, but Donghyuck’s most formal appearance has consisted of a flannel, jeans and his pink converse.

“Everyone likes suits,” Kun winks through the mirror. “All the tiny buttons and the delicate zippers,” he explains. “They take a while to take off.”

“You’re into that?” Taeil knows, judging from the changing room incident at least, but he wants Kun to say it to him.

“I’m into you,” Kun says instead. “Anything else on that pretty frame of yours is just a bonus.”

It’s confirmed when they arrive home and find out there’s nobody else there yet. Kun doesn’t seem to be having any problem with the minimal buttons and zippers of his casual outfit, barely bothers with them, actually.

He takes Taeil out of his pants, pinning his hips against the entrance hall wall, sucking him off right then and there. He’s still on his knees with Taeil’s fingers in his hair when Johnny gets back a little later, leaning down to peck Kun on the lips as he always does, unbothered as he proceeds to step inside for a snack, letting them finish their thing.

***

“Something is up with Hyuck,” Kun says when they’re out having extra late dinner after Taeil is done with work. He doesn’t come by that often at the bar anymore, but he always stays until the end when he does. “He won’t talk to Johnny or me and Johnny is starting to get really worried.”

“Yeah?” Taeil looks up from his paper plate. “Maybe he’s stressed with university?” There are barely any people around. It’s the middle of the night in the middle of the week after all, the sole employee at the fried chicken place playing on her phone, not paying them any attention.

“Wouldn’t he tell Johnny if it was something like that?” Kun tries to wipe the grease off his face with a paper tower but soon gives up, dipping his hands in their shared bucket for one more piece. “Would you mind talking to him? Not to figure out what’s up, just…just for a check in. He really likes you, he might open up a bit.”

“Of course,” Taeil agrees. He has that brief, tiny moment of realisation right then, while drinking his soda. It passes in mere seconds as Kun changes the topic to something else with a small smile, but the thought stays imprinted at a corner of his mind. Taeil cares about these people, he cares so much it’s almost scary because it’s been years since he had last committed to anyone, let alone to more people than just one.

When he drives Kun home and returns to his own apartment the sun is already shyly peeking through the horizon, the city starting to wake up. A couple cars, a few people jogging or bicycling or walking their dogs. Donghyuck’s messenger status is green even at this hour and Taeil, knowing Donghyuck has an irregular sleep schedule, decides to take his chances.

Manoeuvring his way around campus by himself isn’t as difficult as he’d expect and he finds himself at Donghyuck’s door a little before seven, two steaming cups of coffee in his hands. He raps on the door twice and waits until he can pick up the tell-tale shuffling from inside.

“Hyung?” Donghyuck opens up and looks at him. “What are you doing here?”

“I brought coffee,” Taeil lifts the two cups until Donghyuck’s eyes fall on them. “Can I come in?”

“Oh…sure,” Donghyuck opens the door wider and strides back inside, letting Taeil in.

The apartment is pretty much the same as Taeil remembers it. Mostly organised and clean, save for some scattered books and papers stacked hastily on the desk and a small pile of clothes on the floor.

“Here,” Taeil hands the coffee and Donghyuck holds the paper cup between his hands, humming happily at the warmth and giving Taeil a moment to study him. Donghyuck sits on the floor, on the fluffy carpet with his back on the bed frame, and curls up to himself taking small sips. He looks the most tired Taeil has ever seen him, black circles under his eyes and his hair oily, wearing an oversized hoodie that looks like it hasn’t been washed in way too long. “Do you have class today?”

“Only later today,” Donghyuck’s voice comes close to a whisper. “Why are you here so early? You were working last night, right? You should be sleeping.”

“I figured you were awake and decided to pay a visit,” Taeil wonders if Donghyuck has slept. If he has any food in the house. If he’d overstep by buying some groceries and cooking for him while he takes a nap. “I missed you.”

“You missed me?” Donghyuck stares, face breaking out to a gentle smile. “Really?”

“Really,” Taeil confirms. It might not be the truth, but it’s not a lie either.

“Okay,” Donghyuck nods, burying his head between his knees. “Thank you for dropping by, hyung.”

“What time is your class?” Taeil has an idea and maybe they can make it work.

“At five-thirty,” Donghyuck’s house needs a good air out, so Taeil gets up to slightly open the window, leaving the blinds down. He doubts Donghyuck would appreciate the light.

“Kun bought me a set of bath bombs and I’m never gonna be able to use them all,” Taeil didn’t think it through, but maybe a slight change of scenery would help. “Want to come to my place and try them? I’ll cook for you too and I can drop you back here before I have to go to my afternoon classes.”

“Taking a bath at your place?” Donghyuck looks so shy, small on the floor of his tiny studio. “Is that really okay?”

“Of course,” Taeil gulps down the rest of his coffee. “Take some clothes with you,” he looks at the grin forming on Donghyuck’s face. “Unless you want to steal mine.”

The drive back to Taeil’s place is mostly quiet. It’s the morning rush hour so it takes a while, the city loud around them and Donghyuck a familiar warm weight draped over his back on the motorcycle, hands holding Taeil’s waist a little tighter and patting his stomach when they stop at red lights. Sometimes Taeil can see why Johnny is so fond of Donghyuck. Who wouldn’t be? He’s all bark but no bite and at the same time he’s still so young. Taeil knows he’s carrying more on his shoulders than he lets it be shown. Donghyuck doesn’t need any protection, but wants to protect him, anyway. Wants to spoil him and make sure he’s the most comfortable he can be. Maybe Donghyuck’s natural charm just has this effect on people.

“I’ll run you the bath so you can soak while I’m starting on breakfast, right?” Taeil takes his shoes off and Donghyuck mimics him, looking around. It’s his first time setting foot in Taeil’s place and he seems to like the soft light filtering through the windowsill plants in the living room, walking to look out of the windows, nodding along to Taeil’s suggestion.

He picks a violet bath bomb and Taeil, after making sure the water is at a good temperature, leaves him to his own devices to start the cooking. He figures Donghyuck will appreciate a more traditional breakfast since he mostly eats pancakes or waffles when with Johnny and Kun too, indulges him with carbs. He puts some low music on, his grey striped apron, and gets to work.

Donghyuck has been in the bathroom for more than twenty minutes when Taeil knocks on the door and enters after a little “yes?”

“How is it?” He asks, Donghyuck’s knees, nose and top of his head the only parts of his body out of the water. “Breakfast is ready,” Donghyuck’s hair is still mostly dry thought. “Do you want me to shampoo your hair before you get out?”

Donghyuck gets into a sitting position, taking a moment too long to answer.

“If it’s okay, I’d like that.” He seems almost embarrassed to say it out loud and Taeil wonders how long it took him to start asking Johnny for the things he needs. He’s not afraid of being whiny when he’s playing around, but there’s so much pride hiding behind his facade and Taeil doesn’t want to scare him away. 

“I have a vanilla shampoo,” Taeil walks close to the bathtub and kneels on the mat in front of it, picking the bottle. Donghyuck lowers his head, waiting, and Taeil starts massaging the shampoo on his scalp. “That feels good, right?”

“Mhm,” Donghyuck hums, Taeil pressing on his tense nape and shoulders with practised hands, feeling how his muscles start eventually relaxing.

“Is it okay if we drain the water now?” Taeil asks because it has started getting on the cold side of lukewarm. “I can do your back too and then we’ll have breakfast.”

“It’s okay,” Donghyuck says, pulling the plug, still sitting in the tub. He is getting progressively sleepier as he lets Taeil massage his back too and wash his body, then rinse with water. It’s a relaxing process; the way Donghyuck’s eyes shut and he makes small noises of appreciation, how he leans into Taeil’s touch while he is washing the shampoo off.

By the time they are done their breakfast must be getting cold, but the content look in Donghyuck’s eyes and his cheeks tinted a nice rosy colour are all worth it.

“Get dressed, Hyuckie,” Taeil says, wrapping the fluffiest towel he has around Donghyuck’s shoulders after drying his hair. “I’ll be waiting in the kitchen.” He presses a soft kiss on Donghyuck’s temple and almost misses the quiet “thank you, hyung” as he steps out.

Breakfast is uneventful and above all, extremely quiet. Donghyuck eats slowly, almost falling asleep every time he leaves his chopsticks down and Taeil feels waves of adoration washing over him. He suggests taking a nap together because he needs some sleep too and Donghyuck wordlessly agrees. Taeil picks him up to move to the bedroom, maybe not with as much ease as Johnny does it, but enough for Donghyuck to nuzzle on his chest before he’s lowered on the mattress. Taeil doesn’t know when exactly he falls asleep lulled by Donghyuck’s rhythmic breathing, but it’s deep and dreamless.

When he wakes up a couple hours after noon Donghyuck is still asleep next to him, arms and legs thrown over Taeil and for a while he doesn’t even try to untangle himself. Donghyuck looks good, calm in his sleep, drooling just a tiny bit on the pillow.

“Hyung,” Donghyuck mutters, cuddling closer to him. “Is it time to wake up?”

“Not yet,” Taeil threads fingers through soft brown hair. “You can sleep a little more.”

They manage to get out of bed with enough spare time to order pizza for lunch while watching Kun’s cooking show on television. Donghyuck has brought his own clothes, but he’s still wearing Taeil’s oversized green hoodie along with loose sweats. He looks so much better than he did in the morning and even though they didn’t have the chance to talk, Taeil feels like this is enough. When Donghyuck is ready to talk he will, either to Taeil or to someone else.

“Thank you so much, hyung,” Donghyuck hugs him when they’re back at campus. He throws his arms around Taeil’s waist and doesn’t let go for a long while. “It was great today, thank you.”

“We should do it again, then,” Taeil says, rubbing circles on Donghyuck’s back.

“I’ll take up that offer,” Donghyuck smiles on Taeil’s shoulder for a moment before he takes a step back and looks at him. “Really, thank you, Taeil.”

“It was nothing,” Taeil smiles. “I had a good time too.”

“You probably have to leave for your classes,” Donghyuck takes Taeil’s hands to press a kiss on his knuckles. “Thank you a lot for today, and for every other day too.”

***

“For all of us?” Kun looks at the offered piece of clothing. “What’s going on in your head John Suh?” He is laughing, but he ends up smiling when he pulls the hoodie over his head.

“I thought it was cute,” Johnny shrugs, already wearing his own.

“It’s so warm,” Donghyuck purrs, completely engulfed in his own hoodie.

“Are those all the same size?” Kun laughs some more, showing off his hoodie paws.

“Yup,” Johnny smiles, obviously very pleased with himself. He was out shopping after work and came back with a big bag, four identical hoodies inside. Said he thought it’d be “cool and cute” for all of them to have something subtle but matching.

Taeil, who up to that point was kneading the impossibly soft fabric, decides to finally wear it, delighted to see it reaching down his thighs, almost to his knees.

“Hyung,” Donghyuck coos, hugging Taeil. “This is the best present ever, look how cute we are.”

“You’re so sappy,” Kun hits his husband’s arm playfully. It’s cold and snowy outside and they end up a giggly mess on the couch, Kun herding them to sit instead of standing in the middle of the living room.

“You love it,” Johnny kisses Kun that’s on Taeil’s lap.

“I love it,” Kun agrees, cupping Johnny’s cheeks. Donghyuck is trapped under Johnny and is squirming, more in delight than discomfort, although Johnny’s weight isn’t manageable for long, especially not when he’s shifting around sucking face with Kun.

“We should bring the Monopoly out,” Donghyuck says. “Come on, it’ll be so fun.”

“You consider fighting fun?” Kun teases, getting up.

“If my baby wants Monopoly, then we’ll play Monopoly,” Johnny messes Donghyuck’s hair.

“Do you know how to play Taeil hyung?” Donghyuck shuffles to his side, taking Taeil’s hand into his own. “I can’t wait to destroy you all.”

“It’s been some time,” Taeil tries to recall the last time he played any sort of board game. Could have been even a decade ago. “We’ll need to go through the rules once first.”

It turns out Taeil sucks at the game. Kun is decent, but round after round he runs out of luck. Then there’s Johnny that lets Donghyuck have his way. It all adds up to Donghyuck building hotels on more than half the board in the span of two hours and pretty much nobody stopping him seeing how much fun he’s having.

“That’s my new lucky hoodie,” Donghyuck decides, grinning when Kun goes bankrupt after struggling for too many rounds. “Losers have to give me kisses,” he flutters his eyebrows, as if he wasn’t getting kisses anyway.

They pretty much stop playing when Kun pulls Donghyuck on his side, planting a kiss on his lips. Donghyuck doesn’t seem satisfied with it, pushing Kun down onto the carpet and kissing him properly. Taeil occupies himself with picking the little hotel pieces and stacking them on top of each other while Johnny tries to make an origami swan out of the game’s banknotes.

And a little later, when Kun and Donghyuck have stopped kissing but are still rolling on the carpet Johnny fetches one of his wine bottles from his tiny fridge, pouring for all of them after he lights the fireplace up.

“What are we celebrating?” Kun asks, sipping slowly from his glass.

“Nothing,” Johnny smiles at him. “Just being here and being happy.”

Donghyuck giggles, already on his second glass, hanging off of Taeil’s frame. “I love you all so much,” he whispers, breath fanning Taeil’s ear before there’s a wet kiss on his cheek. “You’re the best set of hyungs I could ever ask for, did you know?”

“And you deserve even more,” Taeil cups his face, suddenly overwhelmed with love. “You deserve the best there is, Hyuckie.”

“Love you, Taeil,” Donghyuck rubs by his side. “And those two,” he nods to Kun and Johnny by the fireplace. “I love them more than I can put into words.”

It’s good like this, Taeil thinks. It’s perfect. All of them sitting on the floor, finishing one of Johnny’s most expensive bottles for no good reason at all, the Monopoly board forgotten on the table behind them.

Johnny’s and Kun’s conversation has turned low, like they’re sharing secrets that only the two of them should know although Taeil can still hear everything clearly.

“I can’t drink more,” Kun declines Johnny’s offer of filling his cup. “I have to do some work.”

Johnny stares at him for a moment, an unreadable expression on his face, although Taeil can guess it is something close to hurt. “Not tonight,” he whispers, placing a palm on Kun’s thigh. “Stay with us.”

Kun looks up at him like he does sometimes, like Johnny is the only person in the universe, the only one he can see. He mutters a meek “alright, I’ll stay” so small when Johnny hugs him and doesn’t let go.

“They are lovely, aren’t they?” Donghyuck is still by Taeil’s side, words weirdly drawn out, probably on his way to being properly drunk.

“They are,” Taeil agrees. In their own little bubble that gets rarer and rarer to see as months go by.

“I wish I could be a part of that too,” Donghyuck mouths on his neck lazily and Taeil almost tells him that he is, they both are part of it. But deep down he knows Donghyuck isn’t talking about the bigger picture, the outskirts of Kun’s and Johnny’s relationship. He’s talking about something else, something that Taeil hasn’t caught on yet.

***

“Hey,” the door opens slowly. “Taeil hyung?”

Taeil shifts on the bed leaving his phone aside. He can’t see that well, the light from the corridor casting a shadow over Donghyuck’s features against the dark room. “Hey, come in.”

Donghyuck’s socked feet _pat pat pat_ on the wooden floor and then the bed dips, a big, warm mass rolling to Taeil’s side.

“What’s up?” Taeil turns around to face Donghyuck, the rest of the house too quiet.

“Johnny is out and Kun is working in his study,” Donghyuck says, an arm coming to rest on Taeil’s waist as Donghyuck snuggles closer. “Nobody else to pay attention to me.”

Taeil kisses his pout off softly, Donghyuck’s chapped lips cold on his own. “Am I your last choice?”

“You’re not,” Donghyuck headbutts his chest and Taeil takes a good sniff of his hair, of Johnny’s shampoo. “You’re very precious to me.”

Taeil pecks his nose. “Why are you so worried?” He brings a hand to Donghyuck’s soft cheeks, brushes his thumb over his cupid’s bow. “You should stop biting your lips bloody.”

Donghyuck doesn’t answer for a while. Taeil would almost think he’s fallen asleep if not for his rapid breathing. There’s something on his mind but Taeil won’t pry because he knows; just holding someone like that can be the greatest comfort there is.

There’s little light in the room, but he can see that Donghyuck’s eyes are still open and staring up at him. A door opening and shutting somewhere in the house, probably Kun getting a snack or refilling his coffee. Donghyuck sometimes curls up in the loveseat at Kun’s study and watches him work, like a cat. But Kun has been the tiniest bit of irritable these days, constantly in the brink of exhaustion while trying to balance his work and studies and his social and private life. Taeil on the other hand doesn’t have much on his mind. He’s glad he can be there for Donghyuck.

“Hyung?” Donghyuck asks quietly, head tucked under Taeil’s chin. “Can I spoon you?”

Taeil lets out a tiny giggle, but shuffles on the bed to fulfil Donghyuck’s request. Once he’s facing the wall Donghyuck’s arms come around him again, one thrown loosely on his hip and the other under his head, Donghyuck’s chest against his back and a warm breath down his nape.

“Are you alright?” Taeil asks, feeling Donghyuck’s pulse where their bodies meet.

“Can I talk to you about something?” Donghyuck leaves a kiss at the side of his throat, one more on his clothed shoulder. Taeil knows touch grounds him and hums in affirmation.

“Whatever you want, Hyuckie, I’m listening,” he takes Donghyuck’s hand into his own, playing with his fingers.

“Okay,” Donghyuck is tense, inhaling and exhaling rhythmically for a while, as if he’s timing himself. “So.”

Taeil lets Donghyuck hug him tight and lets him nose on the soft hair of his nape too. They have all the time in the world after all.

“I had a good share of bad relationships, some plainly bad, some—” Donghyuck’s shoulders shake in a tiny shiver. “Some really bad.”

“Okay,” Taeil nods, thumb rubbing Donghyuck’s hand to coax the words out. 

“I grew up in a very conservative environment where nobody knew, not even my siblings and mum. They’re really nice and they love me so much and maybe they’d be supportive. But I never gave them the chance, I’ve never told them anything. Isn’t that pathetic?”

“It’s not,” Taeil mutters. “You have to do things at your own time.”

“When I first came to Seoul and realised that I could be with boys without hiding I started making dumb decisions,” Donghyuck continues. “Sleeping with a lot of people, being reckless, losing a couple of jobs because of bad hangovers and being generally shitty. I was given too much freedom at once and couldn’t handle it, you know?”

“Mhm,” Taeil hums, just to indicate that he’s listening.

“I first met Johnny when I was at a really low point and he helped me way more than I could ever ask for.” Taeil thinks Donghyuck is wetting the back of his shirt with tears, but he doesn’t mind. “I still don’t know why he did it.”

But Taeil knows. He’s seen Donghyuck’s bright smiles and his wide mouthed laughs, he’s seen his witty remarks and his playful banter, he’s seen how he glows, how he shines and sheds light to everyone around him too. He knows Johnny too, he has seen how much of a people’s person Johnny is, how he can see the good in everyone, how he’s too kind for his own good as his husband jokes sometimes.

“You’re worth it, Donghyuck,” Taeil wants to turn back around and face him, engulf him in his embrace but they’re comfortable and warm. “You’re worth every bit of it.”

“I’m in love with him,” Donghyuck blurts. “I’m in love with him, Taeil. I’ve been for some time.”

“Oh baby,” Taeil does turn around. This confession was unexpected, but it also was the most expected out of all the unexpected things Donghyuck could have thrown at him. “It’s gonna be alright.”

“How?” Donghyuck hides his face again but Taeil has already spotted the tears running down his face. “I’m just his—“

“No,” Taeil stops him. “No, you’re not just ‘something’, you know damn well you’re not something replaceable for him.”

“He’s giving me so much already,” Donghyuck looks so scared right then and there, small and somewhat frail, on the verge of breaking. “I could never ask for more.”

“Maybe you won’t have to ask,” Taeil smiles, lips on the crown of Donghyuck’s head. “Maybe when the time comes he’ll give you more by himself.”

And Donghyuck might be a little blinded by his own emotions, but Taeil can see it. The adoration in Johnny’s gaze when it lands on Donghyuck, the touches lingering a little too long, the small moments when Johnny and Donghyuck think they’re in the kitchen alone, kissing and laughing against the counter, Taeil watching from the living room, unsure if he wants to break their bubble. He doesn’t know what it is, he doesn’t know if Johnny knows what it is and where it could lead, but he knows it’s gonna be okay.

“I promise,” he whispers. “I promise this time it will work out.”

Donghyuck’s breath evens out, body pressed on Taeil, safe.

Taeil sees a lot of Kun and Johnny in the following months. Of Kun with Johnny. Of morning kisses and goodnights, of lazy cuddling and making out against the front door right after Kun steps in, with his work clothes still on.

He sees love, he sees adoration and a long running friendship underneath everything. He has a good eye for these things. But he can see the seams too, stretched too thin to ignore anymore. The little bickering that might not be that pointless, that has monsters hiding behind it. The cracks of a relationship that has withstood time, but is about to crumble. A pretty mansion, oh so pretty, but old. Taeil doesn’t know how long it can stand, but he doesn’t want to see it fall.

***

Taeil walks that fine line; being enamored with his partners and at the same time noticing every little thing, all the changes, every shift in anyone’s mood or the atmosphere of their interactions.

Kun’s deadlines draw closer and he’s moody. Johnny comes back home a little later and sometimes hangs at Taeil’s place by himself, drinking beers and talking whatever while playing video games. Donghyuck too is stressed, his finals approaching along with some nasty combinations of essays he has to turn in and other deadlines to meet.

Taeil can’t do much. He teaches his classes, he goes to the bar and then makes the most time available for everyone who needs it and on occasion for himself too. Kun stops coming to the bar for a while, working shut in his study every night until too late instead so Donghyuck becomes his usual assigned night companion.

“The kid’s whipped for you,” Jungwoo tells him when he’s taking a break between songs, downing a vodka shot. Donghyuck is a little further away on a stool, talking Doyoung’s ears off. “He has been bubbling about you non-stop.”

Taeil knows he might or might not be acting as a distraction from Donghyuck’s infatuation with Johnny. He enjoys it nonetheless, because for one he thinks Donghyuck isn’t aware of it and two, he’s quite assured Donghyuck adores him anyway.

_“There are many kinds of love,”_ Kun had told him on one of their long, late night hazy talks. _“Some are intense and passionate and fast and others are slow and quiet and you can’t choose the way you love someone.”_

“Hey,” he raps on the wooden counter to draw Donghyuck’s attention and save Doyoung.

“Hey you,” Donghyuck climbs on the stool next to Taeil and places his head on Taeil’s shoulder. “Hyungie!”

“Any song you wanna hear, pretty boy?” Taeil almost leans in to kiss Donghyuck but holds himself back. Once they start, they can’t stop.

“Play me a love song?” Donghyuck looks up at him. He’s had a bit to drink but he shouldn’t be nowhere near tipsy and Taeil has specifically asked Jungwoo to keep an eye on him. “I’m _your_ pretty boy, after all.”

“There are too many love songs to choose from,” Taeil whines. He is familiar with Donghyuck’s music taste well enough to pick something he’d like, but wants some guidance. Maybe a good song can fix Donghyuck’s mood in ways alcohol can’t.

“Whatever you want, hyung,” Donghyuck pushes him off of his stool. “But it should be for me, right?”

“Right,” Taeil nods, pulling the strap of his electric guitar off of himself to replace it with his acoustic one, a few patrons throwing curious looks his way. “Only for you.”

He taps the mic and clears his throat, more out of habit than need, going through the chords and lyrics of the song he hasn’t sung in so long in his head once before he starts, feeling Donghyuck’s eyes on him. He suddenly feels too shy, looking at the small crowd instead of Donghyuck back at the bar. 

_And you say that you’re not worthy_

_And get hung up on your flaws_

_But in my eyes you are perfect as you are_

_I won’t ever try to change you, change you_

_I will always want the same you, same you_

_Swear on everything I pray to_

_That I won’t break your heart_

_I’ll be there when you get lonely, lonely_

_Keep the secrets that you told me, told me_

_And your love is all you owe me_

_And I won’t break your heart_

He seeks Donghyuck only when he is done, the echo of the last brush of his hand on the guitar strings dying down. He finds Donghyuck’s eyes are already on him, hands balled on his thighs and his lips wet with spit and the last shot he downed.

It’s not any kind of surprise they end up in a toilet stall, even if it hasn’t happened before. They could use the staff bathroom, Taeil thinks, but there would not be any fun in that. Donghyuck pulls him inside with impatient hands, shuts the door and hastily locks it behind him.

“You can’t just do that, Taeil,” Donghyuck says, lips already latched on Taeil’s throat, mouthing sloppily on his pulse point.

“Do what?” Taeil brings his hand up, messes Donghyuck’s already dishevelled hair. “What did I do, baby?”

Donghyuck paws on his chest, kissing the sliver of skin between his collarbones, unbuttoning his shirt just enough to litter a few more kisses.

“You drive me crazy,” Donghyuck drops to his knees, probably too worked up to attempt any make out. “Playing the guitar like this, your voice, I could bet you’re doing it on purpose.”

“Maybe I am,” Taeil moans, Donghyuck’s hand taking him out of his jeans with quick, practised motions.

“You’re so hot,” Donghyuck repeats before he’s spitting in his palm to stroke him. “So fucking hot.”

Taeil laughs at that, at how Donghyuck is short-circuiting beneath him, bubbling away while palming his cock to full hardness.

“I hope you weren’t talking about sucking dick to Doyoung tonight,” Taeil jokes, knowing that soon enough he won’t be able to talk at all.

“Maybe I mentioned something,” Donghyuck kisses his cock, experimentally dragging his tongue on its underside. “About how much I’ve always wanted to suck a singer backstage.”

“That doesn’t c—“ Donghyuck’s lips wrap around him, warm and familiar and inviting and Taeil forgets how his tongue works. It’s a good mix of Donghyuck with the thrill of a semi-public space and the leftover high from his performance.

Donghyuck pushes his hips firm against the door, taking all of Taeil into his mouth and Taeil knows they’re gonna be fast.

He comes, with a little, undignified whimper, just as someone enters the bathroom and Donghyuck keeps sucking him, sloppily and wet and loud until Taeil bites a moan into his fist and Donghyuck looks more than pleased, wiping the mess on his lips with the back of his hand.

“I can,” Taeil nods at Donghyuck’s own tented pants while zipping himself up with shaky fingers. “I can take care of that.”

“Oh, hyung,” Donghyuck gets up and they’re chest to chest, Taeil having to look up. He knows Donghyuck is enjoying this a little too much. “Of course, you can, but you won’t.”

“Why not?” Taeil rests his hands on Donghyuck’s sides, feels him up a little.

“Because you’re gonna take me to your apartment on your motorcycle,” Donghyuck licks his lips. “And fuck me properly on your damn squeaky bed.”

And the offer is too tempting for Taeil to decline. If he could ever decline anything Donghyuck would ask of him, that is.

“Was that song really just for me?” Donghyuck asks later, sprawled out on Taeil’s bed. “Only for me?”

“Only for you,” Taeil smiles, head pillowed on Donghyuck’s chest. “Our song.”

***

“It’s that fucking master’s,” Johnny mutters, too many beers down. He’s sitting at the back porch for a smoke when Taeil gets downstairs to fetch the lunch leftovers. He’s been keeping Kun company for most of the evening and decided they need to eat something. “It’s sucking the soul out of him.”

Taeil takes a couple of steps and Johnny moves aside, enough to make space for one more person. Taeil takes it as an invitation to sit down next to him, staring at the evergreen garden that surrounds the house, groomed to perfection. “It’s sucking the soul out of him.”

“He’s almost done,” Taeil mutters. He has so many things he wants to say. That Kun enjoys it, that it is something important for him, that Johnny isn’t being as supportive as he should. He only says what could maybe ease Johnny’s anxiety, even if just a tiny bit.

“He feels so distant,“ Johnny offers a cigarette that Taeil takes. Kun will hate the smell on both of them afterwards. “I don’t know how to reach out to him and sometimes I’m just so afraid I’m gonna lose him over this.”

“You don’t have to overcomplicate things,” Taeil brings a hand up to Johnny’s back, places it right in the middle. “There is so much love from both sides, don’t let your problems eat you alive from the inside.”

“It’s difficult,” Johnny’s head drops between his knees, his huge frame crumbling.

There is a photo in the living room, hanging above the fireplace. Taeil has passed by it enough times to recall the details clearly. Young Johnny and Kun in front of a river, maybe somewhere in Europe. The biggest of smiles adoring their faces and the wind ruffling their hair. There’s a hickey on Johnny’s neck and Kun’s sunglasses reflect the sun. Taeil has never seen so much happiness in a singular frame.

“I think you need some time alone,” Taeil says slowly, as if he might scare Johnny. “Without me, without Donghyuck, without work, just you two.”

“You think it would work?” Johnny seems sad. Way more than sad, desperate. Taeil knows he misses them, he misses their selves depicted in that one picture above the fireplace.

“You’ll get time to talk and to relax, to recalibrate your relationship,” he pats Johnny’s neck and watches him sit upright. “You are the core and if you collapse, we all do. Me and Donghyuck won’t fix you, nothing external will.”

Johnny puffs smoke out quietly. A small smile is playing on his lips and he leans back on one hand. The air is chilly but Taeil can see why Johnny likes that place. It’s tranquil and a good, soothing kind of dark. A place to drink beers alone and share whispers. Taeil wonders how many secrets that porch holds.

“Me and Kun,” Johnny licks his lips. “Me and Kun are a team, you know.”

“I know,” Taeil smiles. “I know you are.”

“It’s not the first time there are problems and it won’t be the last either,” he discards his cigarette and gets up, joints cracking. “We worked on them before and we’ll keep working on them now, too.”

“Of course,” Taeil smiles. He doesn’t know when Kun’s and Johnny’s happiness started pouring into his own.

“You’re so good for him,” Johnny says as he picks the discarded cans. “You’re so good for us.”

“It’s a give and take from all sides.”

“You have to promise me one thing, now,” Johnny giggles.

“What is it?”

“You have to keep an eye on Hyuckie if me and Kun go away.”

“That, I can promise to do.”

***

“Johnny took some days off,” Kun trails patterns on bare skin with his index. “I don’t know how he did it but apparently we’re leaving for a week and a half in a couple of days, he just told me today.”

“Holidays?” Taeil asks, still looking at the ceiling. The light is low in the room and they should both shower before the liquid mess between them turns solid and disgusting, but he still feels like jelly.

“Yeah,” Kun’s chest heaves and he lets out a deep exhale.” John is booking the hotel and stuff, told me it’s a surprise.”

“You don’t sound very excited,” Taeil turns on his side to take a good look at Kun. He looks worn down, dark circles under his eyes and his soft smile seemingly taking up too much of his energy.

“I am stressed about it,” there’s some noise from the corridor, probably Donghyuck waking up. “I turned in my thesis and the grading will take some time, so I can spare the days, but also—“

“But also?”

“You know, don’t you?” Kun stares right through him. As if with one look he can see each and every of Taeil’s and Johnny’s private conversations. He knows enough of Taeil and even more of Johnny to be able to piece it together. “He’s doing it for us and I’m terrified.”

“Why?” Taeil draws closer, pulling Kun into his arms. “You’re gonna relax and have a good time.”

“What if we don’t? What if we realize we’re heading towards the end?”

“You aren’t. Even if you were, I know you could break it off like proper adults, but you won’t have to.” Taeil loves the curls on Kun’s nape, the soft, overgrown hair. He occupies himself with it. “You just need the time-out and if you’re both willing to talk and work it out I’m sure everything will work just fine.”

“Sometimes it feels like you know more about our relationship than we do,” Kun chuckles, lowering his head, silently asking Taeil to peck the crown of his hair.

“I doubt that,” Taeil laughs and does just that. “Let’s shower, right? Donghyuck must be downstairs.”

“Oh fuck,” Kun groans, peeling himself off the bed. “I can’t risk the little gremlin burning my kitchen down.”

Johnny and Kun leave on a Saturday, explicitly telling Taeil and Donghyuck that they have their door code and can hang out at the house whenever they want. Still, it’s a good chance for them to spend time at Taeil’s apartment and in Donghyuck’s dorm, so that’s what they do.

Donghyuck drags him out shopping for a leather jacket saying that they should be matching when on the motorcycle. He reintroduces Taeil to his university friends as his “boyfriend” to which Taeil later asks “Am I your boyfriend?” and Donghyuck who’s spinning around on his desk chair replies “I like the sound of it, if you want to be.”

So he has a boyfriend now. After their outing for the jacket they go to the flea market too, scanning the stands for pins because Donghyuck wants to decorate his. “Yours is too serious, I need some color on mine,” he tells Taeil.

Taeil ends up with a little sun pin, proudly worn close to his right shoulder and Donghyuck, in the midst of all his other colorful pins, has the matching moon to it.

Johnny sends videos and photos to their group chat, some aesthetic, some silly. There’s Kun at the edge of an indoor swimming pool, looking straight to the camera and there’s a snowy mountain. Then there’s a picture of Johnny, a mess of limbs and skiing equipment, half buried into the snow.

“Just look at them,” Donghyuck shoves his phone on Taeil’s face, showcasing a selfie of Kun kissing Johnny’s cheek, obviously in bed and naked. “Disgustingly in love.”

“They’re cute,” Taeil hums, patting Donghyuck’s back. They’ve been like this for a while, Taeil playing Super Mario and Donghyuck on his lap, koala hugging him, scrolling through his phone. 

“Do you want to get married, hyung?”

Taeil looks at him, mostly at the mess of hair and the nose peeking from his shoulder. “I don’t know, maybe.”

“I want to,” Donghyuck rubs on his chest. “Not now, of course, but in a few years I want to have a beautiful wedding.”

“And a loving husband?” Despite the bumps, Kun and Johnny set the marriage standards really high.

“Especially a loving husband,” Donghyuck takes Taeil’s hand into his own, kissing his palm, his knuckles, the inside of his wrist.

“I hope you find him when the time is right,” Taeil noses on Donghyuck’s hair that smells like Kun’s shampoo.

“Would you marry me?” Donghyuck suddenly sits up straight, palms coming up to the sides of Taeil’s neck.

“Me?” Taeil laughs. “You’d want to marry me?” He rubs slow circles on Donghyuck’s hips, feeling the heat his body emits, a body that’s soft and too familiar “You’d make a good husband,” Donghyuck muses, leaning in to leave the softest of kisses on his lips. “If neither of us is married by the time you’re forty, let’s do it.”

Taeil doesn’t know how serious Donghyuck is, or how much he has been thinking about it, but he mutters the “okay”; just to watch how Donghyuck’s eyes sparkle.

“Do you think we could last that long?” Donghyuck asks, palm on his nape and the other on his chest, right above his heart. “The two of us, and us with the hyungs, too.”

It’s been almost a year into their arrangement and that’s a long time. And it’s working well, it obviously does. At the same time, promising that kind of steadiness for a little less than a decade more is too much so he simply settles for being honest.

“I don’t know,” he says, rubbing the stubble on Donghyuck’s chin with his thumb. “But I do hope we will.”

***

Donghyuck sleeping over at Taeil’s place becomes a common occurrence. Sometimes he drops after his classes when Taeil is done with his afternoon lessons too and they go to the bar together. When their spare days overlap they spend them bundled inside, watching movies, playing video games or cooking. They kiss a lot, Donghyuck even more eager when he’s alone with him, getting all of Taeil’s attention for himself. They make out too, sloppily against all possible surfaces, Donghyuck’s hands under Taeil’s shirt and his semi against his thigh.

“You’re so hot with this on,” Donghyuck slaps his butt when he puts his leather jacket on and Taeil can’t deny he’s enjoying how he’s being looked at when he gets on his motorcycle, at those few moments before Donghyuck gets on and hugs his waist tightly.

So waking up with Donghyuck pressed on his back isn’t unfamiliar. It’s actually the daily occurrence after Kun and Johnny leave for their little holiday. They went to sleep too late after getting back from the bar and Donghyuck was a little tipsy, which means it must be well over noon when Taeil finally wakes up. What’s new is how Donghyuck moves, leisurely rubbing himself on Taeil.

“Baby?” Taeil tries. He was never immune to Donghyuck and he certainly isn’t to a cock rutting against his ass.

“Mhm,” Donghyuck noses on his nape. “Hyung?” His voice is rough, laced with sleep and his arm is thrown around Taeil’s waist, holding him close. “ _Oh_ , hyung.”

“Were you asleep, baby?” Taeil is still dozy, but he doesn’t like how Donghyuck’s hips still, his own cock twitching in interest.

“Yeah,” Donghyuck kisses his nape, whole body flush against him. “Hyungie,” a whine that comes out as a low rumble, Donghyuck’s voice still hoarse and rough at the edges.

Taeil, in his still half-asleep state mutters something that sounds like “fuck” followed by a small “yes” and the Donghyuck’s hand is touching him above his briefs, slowly, carefully. Taeil wants him to be bold, but he can be patient.

“Please tell me you have lube in here,” Donghyuck whispers. “Because there’s no way I’m getting up.”

“Nightstand, at your side,” Taeil replies and feels Donghyuck’s lips turning upwards through the thin fabric of his sleep shirt.

Donghyuck seems content to rub against him and palm at his briefs so Taeil doesn’t try to move. He’s comfortable, Donghyuck is warm and when his palm slides into Taeil’s boxers it’s more than welcome, rubbing the few droplets of precum across the head of his cock.

“I want it so much,” Donghyuck says, each word a kiss between Taeil’s shoulder blades. “I need it, hyung.”

“Then take it, baby,” Taeil places his palm on top of Donghyuck’s hand, guiding it up and down his length. “It’s all yours, I’m all yours.”

Donghyuck is always loud. Taeil knows. He’s heard him lazily mouthing on Johnny’s cock. He’s heard him getting fucked by Kun. He knows Donghyuck’s sounds in and out, both first and second hand. He wants to draw every single one out of him, his high-pitched whining, his deep groans, his begging even, those series of hushed throaty noises.

“Let me finger you, hyung,” Donghyuck shifts around, finding the lube, making an _ah_ probably fishing the condoms Taeil keeps there too. “Do you want to do it like that?”

“Yeah,” Taeil just wants anything. He has gotten too spoiled with Johnny and Kun, falling onto bed every couple of days and now it’s been a solid week since they left and he hasn’t exchanged more than kisses and some heavy petting with Donghyuck, too busy doing all other kinds of things with each other.

Donghyuck pulls his boxers down, taking his time kneading Taeil’s ass for a few moments before there’s the _click_ of the lube tube. A few breaths and then it starts getting messy, Donghyuck not bothering to use a second hand, still slotted under Taeil's head. He spreads Taeil’s ass and rubs his index around the rim slowly, testing the waters.

“My fingers aren’t as thick as Johnny’s,” Donghyuck says, slowly pushing the first digit in. “I’m not as big as him,” his voice between a whine and assertive, something only Lee Donghyuck could manage. “But I’m good hyung, I’ll be so good to you.”

“You still think Johnny is the one that does the fucking with me?” Taeil says, explicitly to rile Donghyuck up and chuckles when he feels his fingers still. “Johnny’s a very good boy for me.”

“Oh fuck,” a second finger is added carefully and finally the drag starts feeling good. “That’s so hot,” Donghyuck’s erection is still there, rubbing on the back of Taeil’s thighs with his little motions, although seemingly forgotten. “You’ll both fuck me when he comes back.”

“Mhm,” Taeil hums, trying to concentrate on Donghyuck’s fingers instead of touching himself. It’s too early for that and Donghyuck already feels good, so good.

“Who’s that?” Donghyuck asks, lapping his tongue at the side of Taeil’s neck. “Kun?”

“Kun,” Taeil confirms. A pretty purple bruise as a parting gift.

“I don’t like that,” Donghyuck kisses over the spot sweetly. “You’re mine now,” he sinks his teeth on the bruise and for a moment it’s almost too much, until there’s a third finger added and Taeil’s whimper turns into a deep, breathless moan.

“Feels good,” he breathes out, trying to calm himself. “Come on, come on Hyuck.”

“Ready?” Donghyuck shuffles, spreading his lube covered palm on Taeil’s stomach, rubbing down his dark trail and giving a few tugs to his cock. “Can you take me, hyung?”

“Don’t keep me waiting,” Taeil whines, taking a look and seeing Donghyuck rolling the condom on himself. He’s pretty, flushed, curved, neatly trimmed hair on his navel and a soft stomach to complete the image.

Donghyuck moves around, getting close to him again. He slides a teasing hand between Taeil’s cheeks again, spreading some more lube before stroking himself. Then he’s lifting Taeil’s leg up, the head of his cock touching Taeil’s rim.

“You want it, hyung?” He presses a kiss on Taeil’s back. “Want me to fuck you?”

“Donghyuck.” Taeil rubs himself on Donghyuck and that’s what does the trick, Donghyuck pushing inside slowly until he bottoms out with a pleased groan.

It’s easy to go from there, albeit a little tiring; Donghyuck keeps his leg up, Taeil bracing himself on the mattress when the thrusts start turning shallow and fast. Donghyuck murmurs into his ear, little “I love you”s and “does it feel good, does my cock feel good, hyung”s that build Taeil up until he can’t help it anymore. He frees himself from the front of his boxers that were still awkwardly clinging on him, palming his cock, stroking in time with Donghyuck’s movements.

“You feel so fucking good,” Donghyuck groans. He almost stills, hips moving in small circles and his cock buried deep inside Taeil.

Taeil tries to say something then, but it comes out in a choked moan, Donghyuck rubbing his prostate just right. “Fuck, Donghyuck.”

“Yes?” Donghyuck legs his leg fall, splaying his hand on Taeil’s hipbone instead, pulling him close every time he thrusts into him.

“Right there,” Taeil feels his own hand shaking around himself, his orgasm too close.

“Wait a little for me, won’t you?” Donghyuck’s hand creeps at Taeil’s front. “Let me do it for you.” He swats Taeil’s hand away and wraps his own instead, rubbing Taeil’s cock slowly, out of rhythm, definitely on purpose.

Taeil can feel Donghyuck throbbing inside him, dragging out every little motion while he litters kisses across Taeil’s nape and shoulders. They come like this, almost still, Donghyuck with a little jerk of his hips and a moan, staying inside as he rubs the head of Taeil’s cock messily until he’s coming on the sheets too.

“That was nice,” Donghyuck says a bit later when they’re both on their backs, ignoring the sticky mess between them. “Want me to make breakfast when you shower?”

“We can shower together,” Taeil says, maybe too enthusiastically for how tired he is feeling. “And then make breakfast.”

“Sounds good,” Donghyuck’s hand caresses Taeil’s bare stomach lazily.

They take a nap instead, and by the time they wake up and have a second round in the shower it’s way past breakfast time. It’s alright though, kissing while making lunch together is just as fun.

***

“Missed you!” Is the first thing Johnny shouts when they meet after he and Kun are back and then Taeil is being picked up, his legs slotting around Johnny’s waist on instinct.

“Hello there,” Taeil tilts his head, letting an overexcited Johnny press pecks on his neck and under his chin. “In a good mood?”

“The best mood,” Johnny smiles looking into his eyes. “Kun had to go straight to work but he’ll be back for dinner and Hyuckie is on the way.”

“You can’t even do two full weeks without us,” Johnny rubs his cheek against Taeil’s like an oversized cat.

“Well, I sure wish we could have stayed a little more,” Johnny lets him down slowly, still keeping him cornered against the fridge. “But I missed you, _we_ missed you.”

Taeil cups his face, pulling him down for a kiss, sweet and chaste, familiarly soft lips softly moving against his own. Knowing Johnny and Kun would be returning Taeil had done a bit of grocery shopping and was getting started on dinner. Donghyuck mentioned in their group chat he’d be there as soon as he was done with the day’s classes.

“I assume the trip went well?” He asks, Johnny finally letting him take the rest of the groceries out of their bags giving a proper once over at Johnny while at it. The black circles are still there, but the corners of his eyes are wrinkling with happiness. He’s casual, just a long-sleeved shirt and sweats, his hair is messy, overgrown now.

“It did,” Johnny smiles, voice dreamy. “It was…so good.”

“Lots of champagne beside private pools?” Taeil takes Kun’s cooking recipes notebook out of its shelf. A couple months ago he had started scribbling down his own recipes in it too.

“Way more than that,” Johnny _beams_. “It almost felt like a second honeymoon.”

“I’m happy for you,” Taeil lets Johnny drape over him to read above his shoulder, press kisses on every sliver of exposed skin.

“I’m not saying everything is perfect,” Johnny continues. “But I think we fixed something.”

Taeil turns around to kiss him sloppily on the cheek, just slightly missing the curve of his lips. He’s happy, he’s so happy for someone else’s happiness because it’s his own too.

“I should have a shower before Hyuck is here,” Johnny muses.

“He’s gonna jump on you and won’t let go for the rest of the week,” Taeil laughs. He doesn’t move, letting Johnny relax on him, press a kiss on his nape, caress his stomach and hold him close.

Kun is the second to arrive, cheeks rosy from the cold and the widest smile on his face as he steps in, takes his shoes off and walks to the kitchen to slap Taeil’s ass in a greeting before slotting himself on Taeil’s side.

“Hello partner,” Taeil greets, nosing Kun’s hair, taking in the smell of an unfamiliar generic shampoo. “Heard you missed me.”

“As if you didn’t,” Kun peppers his cheek with kisses. “Something smells nice.”

“It isn’t you,” Taeil laughs, tapping the kitchen counter to pull Kun’s attention to the stovetop.

“Rude,” Kun chuckles. “Guess I can’t complain since I’m getting dinner.”

“Your husband is upstairs showering,” Taeil nods to the staircase. “If you move quickly enough you might just catch him with a good amount of clothes on.”

“That’s none,” Kun laughs, wide and loud, tired but so happy too.

“That’s none!” Taeil agrees, swatting Kun away to finish as much of his cooking as possible before the beloved menace of the house steps through the door.

That day, like many others before and more that will follow, ends in the living room, with them sprawled on the couches, some movie nobody is paying attention to on the screen and the lights dim, just enough to not trip when they’ll have to eventually move.

They talked about Kun and Johnny’s holiday, about the resort and playing in the snow and their attempt at skiing being a complete disaster, along with how hot Johnny looks on a snowboard. They asked about Taeil and Donghyuck across the dinner table, a dozen dishes spread between them. They talk and talk and there’s a shift, an almost plausible shift in the way Kun and Johnny look at each other, in the way their smiles reach their eyes again and Taeil hopes it’s way more than the afterglow of their trip.

When they’re full and sitting upright is a chore, Donghyuck makes quick work of claiming Johnny as his own for the rest of the evening, pushing him down on the couch, climbing on his lap and letting his head fall on Johnny’s chest like that’s where it belongs.

“I love him,” Kun whispers, nuzzling close to Taeil, warm and soft in his patterned pajamas. “I haven’t genuinely told him in so long, I haven’t thought about it in so long and now it’s all I can think about.”

Taeil holds him because there isn’t much he can do. He’s watching from the sidelines, watching the pieces get back together to create a whole again, the whole in which he and Donghyuck both fit, the crevices of Johnny’s and Kun’s relationship seemingly tailored just right for the two of them.

“There’s something else too,” Kun mutters, so softly that Taeil almost misses it under Donghyuck’s giggling fit in the background.

“What is it,” Taeil feels his heart bursting with the way Kun is soft into his arm, as if years of tension have been shredded off of his frame.

“My thesis got accepted,” it’s whispered as if it’s a secret, as if Kun repeats it loud enough for the world to hear he’ll wake up from a dream. “My supervisor let me know two days ago.”

Taeil holds him a little tighter, as tight as it goes. He whispers congratulations against soft skin, against cheeks rough with stubble, against short hair. “Of course it did,” he smiles, feeling Kun leave a breath between his arms. There are no more words needed, no _congratulations_ , not even the _I love you_ almost spilling from Taeil’s lips. Taeil is sure Kun already knows, can see every little thing Taeil would ever want to say reflected into his eyes when they look at each other.

Even later, when they fall all together on the bed in the master bedroom; that’s when it gets messy, like it always does when all four of them are together. Johnny mostly watches, partly because he is too tired and partly because he enjoys the view, lets them know he does.

Kun fucks Taeil like he’s missed him too much, whispering words too soft between each thrust while Donghyuck stays pliant and blissful underneath them. It’s good to the point of being overwhelming; so many hands, so many little breathy sounds Taeil wants to drink up; so little time because they know how to touch each other just right. 

He passes out naked, not bothering to shower and in the worst position imaginable, knowing he is going to wake up gross and sore the next morning. He doesn’t care because all the happiness of waking up to a full bed will make up for it. 

***

There are only two months left before Donghyuck’s graduation, Kun there as a postgraduate of the same faculty too and their anticipation is growing bigger every single day.

Taeil’s routine doesn’t change, not really, but a lot of things are simultaneously happening, all good, all steps to a forward direction that is familiar but still new.

It starts with Donghyuck in Taeil’s apartment bubbling about the paid internship he’ll be starting a few weeks after his graduation at some place close to Doyoung’s bar.

Taeil is half out of it, too early in the morning for his mind to compute anything more than making them breakfast and a good amount of coffee to last till noon. Donghyuck is at his home though, like he so often is, so in his half-unconscious state when Donghyuck says he has to look into apartments for when his dorm lease is over, Taeil murmurs “just move in with me”, Donghyuck freezing against the kitchen island.

“Really?” Donghyuck tilts his head, a smile about to take over his face and Taeil hasn’t thought about it at all, but at the same time considers it almost the most natural next step. Two households to spend their time instead of three, although they rarely stayed at Donghyuck’s dorm with the miniscule space and cardboard walls.

“Really,” Taeil confirms, Donghyuck picking him up and spinning him around like a simple sentence made him the happiest man in the whole world. Half of Donghyuck's wardrobe is already taking up half of Taeil’s closet anyway, there won’t even be much to move.

The series of fortunate events of the following weeks continues with Donghyuck at the center. With him telling Johnny “the internship is going to pay me decently, hyung, I won’t need you to keep putting money in my account.”

Johnny smiles, smiles so wide and looks over at Kun and Taeil a few feet away from him and Donghyuck. “No more sugar daddying, then.”

“No,” Donghyuck says and Taeil is sure he knows Johnny would never let him go, but he can still see how tense he is, staring up at Johnny, chest heaving with a breath he’s holding.

“I’d like to be your boyfriend then,” Johnny grins. “Your boyfriend who occasionally showers you with presents maybe, since old habits die hard.”

And Donghyuck cries, Johnny holding him and caressing his head. It’s tears of relief and happiness and it’s one more step taken. Taeil thinks they will never stop changing and moving, but maybe they will somewhat settle to something comfortable for all after this time of many changes.

He knows Kun and Johnny will never love them in the same way they love each other, but it doesn’t mean that love directed to him or Donghyuck is any less. It’s different, and it’s still new for him. And Taeil’s love for Donghyuck feels new too, but there’s something else there, something he can’t put his finger on. Something that only Jungwoo knows once Taeil has downed one too many shots and doesn’t even remember the next morning.

Above the fireplace at Kun’s and Johnny’s house photos start popping, neatly placed in simple black or silver frames. Some are shaky, taken with phones on unsteady hands, others almost professional looking, straight out of Johnny’s camera.

There’s the silhouette of Johnny kissing Taeil’s nose, a sunset in the background, taken on a rainy, damp day at the nearby park. There’s Kun and Donghyuck on top of a water slide from one of their weekend trips, skin tan under the warm sun and smiles wide on their faces, the shot taken moments before Donghyuck pushed Kun down.

Then there are strips from photo booths, from the amusement park and the mall, all four of them struggling to fit in and appear in the pictures, getting sillier and messier on every frame.

Taeil has sets of pictures in his own apartment too along with a growing collection of small souvenirs. Some bought by himself from the places they visit, others being little gifts given to him. The physical manifestation of their relationship contained knickknacks and plushies, the one Johnny got him at their very first date making its home on Taeil’s bed.

All three of them show up at the end of the year showcase of the music school too even though he tells them it’s not that big of an event, held at a small neighborhood theater mainly for the parents to see their kids perform in a somewhat classy setting.

He has had Doyoung see him sing and play the piano before in similar events, but as time went by, as much as he loved the job it became somewhat monotonous, the showcase just another work obligation for him; having to talk and get congratulated by parents and hugged by his students afterwards.

There’s no leather jacket or electric guitar this time. He wears a new dark blue pair of slacks along with a matching vest, a pink handkerchief tucked in his chest pocket. The lights are blinding so he can’t see any faces in the audience, but he plays the piano and croons into the mic knowing that Kun and Johnny and Donghyuck are all there. He knows it’s the best performance he has put in, in ages, closing the show and receiving rounds of never-ending applause as the curtain falls with him still seated at the piano stool.

Johnny is the first to find him backstage, shoving a bouquet in his arms in his typical fashion and then he’s hugged from all sides. He wishes someone would take a photo, preserve the love he felt in that moment forever, but he also knows he’d never forget it anyway.

He has to engage in conversation afterwards, the parents, the other teachers, the school owner passing by like flashes of laughter and greetings and polite talk. He smiles through it, genuinely smiles, knowing that soon enough he’ll be in bed, maybe with someone undressing him, maybe with someone cuddling him. As long as it’s with his people, his boyfriends, his partners, he doesn’t care about the final outcome of the night, not when he knows it’ll be a good one.

***

The day of the graduation the weather graces them with clear skies and a slight breeze, the open gardens where the ceremony is taking place beautifully decorated in light blue and white; the university’s colors.

Taeil and Johnny arrive together looking for the numbered seats Kun reserved for them, Ten and Taeyong already there and waving for their attention. They do some catching up while the rest of the seats start filling up, someone checking the singular microphone on the stage.

They haven’t seen Donghyuck the past two days, his mother and siblings coming to attend his graduation and him wanting to spend some time with them before they head back home. Taeil sent him a few messages in the morning telling him that he and Johnny will be in the crowd, that he’s proud and maybe sending too many kissy stickers. He gets a selfie back, Donghyuck with his gown on, a little too big on him but absolutely wonderful.

Thankfully it’s only the science department graduation so it doesn’t take unbearably long save for the faculty opening speeches. Johnny’s leg is bouncing up and down excitedly, one of Ten’s palms on his thigh trying to keep it down and failing. Taeyong doesn’t talk or move much, a serene expression on his face as he watches people go up and down the podium with interest.

“Hyuckie!” Johnny slaps Taeil’s side, intertwining their fingers. “Look at him!”

Donghyuck’s name gets called and he steps on the podium, a little bounce to his step. Even if Taeil can’t make out his expression he knows, instinctively, that he is wearing his widest smile. The gown is big on him, polished shoes underneath and soft tuffs of freshly bleached hair peeking out of his cap. Johnny lifts his camera to take a photo right as Donghyuck receives his diploma with a little bow. And then he’s stepping down, the moment over in mere seconds.

“Hey,” Ten taps his arm, handing him a tissue. “It’s alright.”

Taeil doesn’t remember tearing up out of pride for someone before, but Donghyuck proves himself to be one more of his firsts.

They have to wait towards the end for Kun, which is alright since they weren’t going to leave anyway. Kun standing on the podium to deliver his speech, praising the university and introducing his research topic comes as a surprise judging from the looks and little gasps he receives, chuckling a little before he straightens up and taps his mic once. It’s not every day you see a television cooking celebrity talking about aerial thermodynamics.

They find themselves tipsy on cheap champagne about an hour later, the buffet open to all attendees and loaded with finger food. Some people try to talk or even take photos and autographs from Kun who indulges them, but he mostly stays wrapped around Johnny’s arm, holding his gigantic bouquet.

“To mister Qian, a master’s degree holder” Ten lifts his glass and they all mirror him, Taeil feeling too happy and maybe a little silly.

“To growth,” Kun clinks his glass with the other ones, a slight blush across his cheeks. “I’m so happy you’re here today.”

“We’d never miss it,” Taeyong rubs Kun’s shoulder and Taeil figures it must be almost unbearably hot with the gown on.

“Hyungs,” Donghyuck appears, his cap off and his gown a mess. Maybe the aftermath of his siblings and mother hugging him too tight. “I wish I could get shit-faced with you but I have to leave for lunch, I just wanted to, you know, see you.”

“Come here,” Kun opens his arms, Donghyuck hugging his waist tightly. “You made it, baby.”

“We both did,” Donghyuck relaxes into Kun’s hold for a moment before he draws back. “Don’t wait for me because I might be late, but I’ll come home tonight,” he whispers, Kun giving him a nod. “I’ll see you,” he turns to Taeil and Johnny, probably knowing his mother is watching him from afar, wanting to have to answer as few questions as possible.

By the time the crowd starts dissipating they are pretty buzzed so Johnny’s car stays abandoned. They call a taxi instead, bidding Ten and Taeyong goodbye knowing they’ll meet them again soon, Johnny admiring the gold band on Taeyong’s finger for a short moment before they part.

They stumble home in a mess, Kun taking his gown off right in the middle of the living room, revealing the blue button up and white slacks he’s wearing underneath. He face-plants on the couch while Johnny fixes him something quick to eat before he team tags with Taeil to drag Kun upstairs for a shower.

All three end in the bathtub, more making out sloppily than shampooing their hair as originally intended. When pushed on the bed Taeil is wearing a pair of Johnny’s pajamas even though his own are one room away, but everyone’s too tired and sleepy to bother with fetching their own clothes. They put Kun in the middle of the bed, cuddling him through the night from both sides; just one more on the avalanche of presents he receives for his graduation.

Taeil is the only one that stays up, Kun’s soft snoring and Johnny’s loud one echoing in the room when the door creaks open and Donghyuck tiptoes inside.

“Hyuckie,” Taeil whispers, making grabby hands for him, feeling like he couldn’t drift off without Donghyuck by his side. They sleep together so much that it’d feel wrong, incomplete.

“Hyung,” Donghyuck’s voice is soft, as soft as his movements when he climbs on the bed, right between Taeil and Kun. “I went drinking with friends.”

“We all had a good time today,” Taeil throws an arm around Donghyuck’s waist. “How does it feel?”

“I’m not sure,” Donghyuck plays with Taeil’s fingers. He has changed into sleep clothes but he smells like alcohol and his cologne and Kun’s shampoo underneath everything else.

“It’s okay,” Taeil messes his hair, the strands long and rough to the touch, but Donghyuck rubbing up to his hand the same as ever. “It takes a while until you realize things are changing.”

“I guess,” Donghyuck looks at the two sleeping forms next to him. “But us four, I hope we won’t change.”

“Only for the better,” Taeil assures him, lazily threading through his hair until Donghyuck’s breath evens, moments before his own does too.

_Life is a drink and love's a drug_

_Oh, now I think I must be miles up_

_When I was a river dried up_

_You came to rain a flood_

**Author's Note:**

> The song Taeil sings at the bar is John Legend’s _Conversations in the dark_ and the one at the very end is Coldplay’s _Hymn for the Weekend_.
> 
> Some extras and scenes that didn't make it into the fic:  
>   
> *Donghyuck studies physics and signs up for tutoring with Kun, so that's how he meets him.  
>   
> *Taeyong takes too long to propose because he’s trying to teach his and Ten’s cat to carry the ring to Ten. Takes some time but it works out just fine and they have their wedding at early summer, a couple weeks after the graduation, pool party and all!  
>   
> *Kun eventually quits his cooking show to make a career out of his degree and true love.  
>   
> *Taeil and Donghyuck move into a bigger apartment just so they can have a piano in the living room and eventually Taeil teaches Donghyuck how to play the electric guitar.  
>   
> *Their four-people arrangment keeps going strong even after years.  
>   
> *Donghyuck and Taeil end up getting married. They don’t keep the promise of waiting until Taeil is forty, though. Donghyuck is too impatient for that and proposes at Taeil’s 38th birthday.
> 
> Drop by my [twt](https://twitter.com/kuns_dimples)!


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